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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Wow, op. Just wow. If I was your mom I would never give you another dime--before or after I die,[/quote]

+1 You sound very ungenerous. Having a hard time making ends meet on $400K is a hard sell to someone who's living just fine on far less $$.

Your mom's gift of $50K is not large, and especially not to someone whose HHI is $400K. Are you unable to save?

Our income is far less, and we've saved a lot. We've bought several homes and had $$ for down payments because we're savers. We drive old cars, live below our means, don't spend a lot of $$ yet sent our kids to private schools when they needed to go.

I get that you are irked by the "unfairness" of the whole thing, but as I tell my children: You get what you need, not what you want. That's fair. [/quote]

But where is the line between want and need?  Yes, you need food and shelter.  But do you NEED to have steak every night and live in a nice house?  Sure is nice, but not a need. People survive renting an apartment as well as buying a small condo or townhouse.  I am raising my kids with the idea that they have the job that can support the lifestyle they want to lead.  I don't think my job as a parent is to subsidize their lifestyles once they are an adult.  I may choose to for example pay for my children and grandchildren to do to Disneyworld but that would be for me, that I wanted to treat them.  That being the case, I would make the offer regardless of what my kids make.  I also wouldn't expect it to be that they look for grandma to fund every vacation and say, hey next year can you take us to San Francisco.  Then again, as I write this maybe it is a reflection of what the person giving the money feels is a need.  If they feel like someone must have a big wedding, a nice house, private education for their kids, a mom that stays at home etc or else it isn't a life worth living, then I understand why it would make perfect sense to give money to the adult child that doesn't have those things.  I'm of the school that you have to learn to be happy with what you have and there will always be someone with more and always with someone less.  Also, what you have today, you may not have tomorrow so you can't build your happiness on that.  So by my definition most things would be a gift because I want to give it, not a need to live a happy life, so in that case why wouldn't I gift something to my other child even if it isn't the exact same thing?  At Christmas would I give one child a car and another a sweater?  If not, why would I do that with off cycle gifts?[/quote]

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