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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I would be annoyed also OP.

As far as the idea that since these kids are cousins and so you need to encourage the relationship?  A four year (or more) age difference is huge for little kids.  HUGE.  Your DD is blissfully ignorant of the snub her aunt and uncle have given her.  So, by all means let a normal, once or twice a year visit/relationship develop but don't assume that your kid and theirs need to be best buddies or something.

If your DH wants them at his party then they should be there.

Let bygones be bygones.  Forgive but don't forget.  I'd never feel totally enthusiastic about these relatives but it's not like they were actively mean to your child.  Just unable to interact with her because of their own (selfish) reasons.  [/quote]

I disagree--my daughter's cousin is almost four years older, and they adore each other.  That doesn't mean that we see her all the time, but it does mean that the cousin relationship can be very meaningful.  I can't stand my SIL (and my BIL totally enables her), but since the girls love each other, I suck it up and spend more time with them than I would like.  And it's worth it to see the cousins having a wonderful time together.  So, I wouldn't necessarily forget the ILs' behavior, which was crappy even if understandable, but I would keep that to myself for the sake of the kiddos.  [/quote]

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