Reply to SAHMs, do you worry about your husband leaving you?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm about to give it all up soon and be a "trailing spouse". I do worry about the "what ifs" but I have a nice little nest egg of my own that should help me. I'd also fight pretty hard for 1/2 in light of giving up my career. Dh thinks it'll be easy to just get a new job every time we relocate but I'm not as optimistic in this economy, especially when I'll most likely have gaps of employment while we are located overseas. I did read that after so many years of marriage, I'm entitled to some amt of his pension as well. So yes I'm worried but I've taken steps to mitigate the devastation.[/quote]

50/50 is the law in Virginia, lady.  Don't assume that what you've put away is "yours."  You are only entitled to a percentage of the pension earned during the marriage. Sine the pension is determined from your DH's "high-three" earning years, you will get a portion of the pension based on his "high three" at the time of the divorce.  If he earns more and gets a higher pension 20 years down the road, you are SOL.  [/quote]

What makes you think I'd file in virginia? Do you know what a "trailing spouse" is? Anyway my bank account was established long before marriage and is in my name only. I'm under the impression that makes it separate property and thus he can't touch it. Am I mistaken?[/quote]

In MD you are mistaken. That money is your and only yours ... as in your H can't get a hold of it as long as you are married. Conversely, a H can put all the family money in 1 account and the wife can not get a hold of it if the account is in his name and only his name.

Once you file for divorce it becomes a marital asset and it will be split 50/50, along with all the other marital assets.

But it is good to have you own account when married because you can hire a lawyer and get out if you end up in abusive situation. But if you don't have you own account you H can hide all the money and you are basically stuck until the divorce determines your assets.

(Of course you can replace H with W and vise versa depending on your situation)[/quote]

One correction. The money that was there before the marriage (if it just sat there) is yours (if money goes in an out of that account it is a little different), because they are not marital assets, but all the interest during the marriage is a marital asset. [/quote]

Also, inheritances which are not commingled are not marital assets.[/quote]

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