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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I haven't read the replies but want to mention something, OP.  There is a very interesting paperback book that's worth reading called Rediscover Catholicism, A Spiritual Gide to Living with Passion & Purpose by Matthew Kelly.

I bring it up because I was raised Catholic and am very much a Catholic-light-type, so I am sympathetic to your situation.  On the other hand, there is a big difference between what's going on in Rome, or even at the American Cardinal/Bishop level and what goes on at a particular parish.  For instance, my kids go to a Catholic school that is connected to a parish and it's a very healthy community; the priest is lively and engaging; the families are lovely.

Some parts of the larger institution are toxic, and those parts get a lot of media attention.  But on the local level, it can be a very positive experience.

Now the book comes in because it can help explain what Catholicism is supposed to be about and probably what your DH is connecting to.  For instance, the whole concept of hospitals is a Catholic concept.  In Jesus's time all those lepers were just out on the street to die. The Catholic concept of a hospital is *not* connected to faith--[b]they will take anyone, not just a believer, and it's not about converting a patient, it's just about helping another human being.[/b]

Anyways, just want to mention stuff like this because there is a way to reframe this situation; one way to look at it is your DH is moving away from your values and beliefs, but that framing isn't helpful to your marriage so I'm trying to help you get a different angle on it.

Now 11am mass to cut into your day?  That's a different issue and yup, that is worth a negotiation.[/quote]

Unless, of course, it's a woman who suffers from a pregnancy that is killing her - then they won't do anything to help her unless/until the fetus dies or is expelled from the uterus without intervention.

Sorry, just had to say that.  I gave birth at a Catholic hospital twice and know they do good work (although despite all the rhetoric, they don't take in as high a percentage of indigent patients as non-Catholic hospitals do - look it up).  But the recent cases out there where women have died or come close to dying because the hospital refused to abort a pregnancy gone wrong are truly galling, and the prospect of more and more hospitals being taken over by the Catholic church and then refusing to do tubal ligations, give women who have just been raped any kind of treatment to prevent pregnancy, etc. is scary news for anyone who cares about women's health.

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/husband-ireland-hospital-denied-savita-halappanavar-life-saving-abortion-because-it-is-a-catholic-country/

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/02/29/opinion/womens-health-care-at-risk.html?_r=0

http://www.nytimes.com/2013/12/03/us/lawsuit-challenges-anti-abortion-policies-at-catholic-hospitals.html

http://www.salon.com/2013/12/03/catholic_hospitals_grim_hypocrisy_letting_women_suffer_in_the_name_of_life/

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/angela-bonavoglia/reproductive-crisis-do-no_b_602086.html

http://rhrealitycheck.org/article/2013/03/25/dont-take-her-to-catholic-hospital/

[/quote]
Ok, PP, you can rebut all I wrote, but my point was to help OP, in this case by reframing the situation.  It's not helping OP to throw the baby out with the bathwater because of some hospital idiots who don't have the teachings right (because that is not the Church's teachings when a woman's life is in jeopardy)  But all that is off-point.

PP, I completely agree that the Church is f'd up in a variety of ways.  I'm just saying that if her DH is attracted to it, he's probably attracted to the good part of it, not the toxic part of it, and focusing on that may help them seem less far apart on this issue.[/quote]

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