Reply to I'm Jewish. Ask me anything.

Forum Index » Religion

Reply to "I'm Jewish. Ask me anything. "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP here; Jew married to a Non-Jew.  Responding to various points that have been brought up in this thread.

I belong to a reform synagogue that is accepting of interfaith marriage and very welcoming to all.  I don't go to services but I am involved in other aspects of synagogue life, volunteering, participating in various educational opportunities etc.  To me being a Jew is so much a part of my identity and I appreciate the values that Judism teaches, but the actual services or spiritual aspects do not move me.  There are lots of "Jewish atheists" in my synagogue.

We have a tree and I have a Star of David topper.  I'm irreverant that way.  I also give a big holiday party every year and call it Chrismukka and serve brisket and latkes with candy canes and egg nog. (lots of other stuff too but you get the idea)

My friends come from all over.  I don't exclusively hang out with Jews.  As I mentioned above, my husband is not Jewish.

I bend over backwards to avoid the "cheap" stereotype.  Eg. I never quibble about a restaurant bill and I tip well.

[b]There is a "Jewish Look" because the grandparents and great grandparents of the majority of Jews in the U.S came from Eastern Europe and the former Soviet block countries during the years 1884-1924.  My great grandparents and grandparents came from Russia and Poland. [/b]

There are many of us that don't necessarily support the current Israeli government, but all of us believe in Israel's right to exist and the need for a Jewish homeland.  I didn't support the GWB administration here at home, but I was and still am proud to be an American.  I don't think that being critical of the Israeli govt equates with being antisemitic.  Sometimes it does, but it isn't automatic. [/quote]

I think that most would agree that there is a "Jewish Look" just as there is an Irish Look, a Swedish Look, an Italian Look, etc.  The question is, why is it offensive to say "you don't look Jewish" or "she looks Jewish" whereas it is not offensive to say e.g. "you don't look Irish" or "she looks so Swedish"?[/quote]

[b]Because this "observation" is often associated with general stereotyping or outright bigotry.[/b]  In earlier days, looking, e.g., Irish, was also associated with these things ("no Irish need apply").  Not so much anymore.

I'm Jewish, but I guess I didn't look it, at least when I was a teenager.  I had several experiences with "friends" and acquaintances making blatantly antisemitic remarks to me -- about others.  The best was one when one pretty girl whose pants I wanted to get into was talking about a particular family she didn't like, and I asked her why.  She wrinkled her nose, and said under her breath in a drippingly contemptuous tone, "they're Jews."  I guess my expression gave me away, and she started to apologize, but that was of course it for us.  Happily, I went to the same college with her blonde, blue-eyed cousin, with whom I also had a mutual attraction, and who I fucked.  We had a good laugh about her cousin as part of our pillow talk.

Living well isn't the best revenge; it's fucking their cousin and laughing about them with her.

But back to the original point, yeah, "you don't look Jewish" is up there with asking a black girl if you can touch her hair.[/quote]

Sorry, not buying it.  Just because it has been associated with bigotry over the years doesn't mean that everyone making that observation in the here and now is a bigot.  As you say, not so much anymore.  Reacting with offense at such a statement is just a knee-jerk, cry-antisemitism response.  Not buying it.

Aside from that, you sound like a misogynistic jerk.[/quote]

How often do you hear someone say, "oh you don't look Swedish," vs. "oh you don't look Jewish?"  The reason is because being Jewish connotes a set of characteristics besides appearance, and so whether one is or is not Jewish matters to the speaker more than being Swedish does.  When people say "you don't look Jewish," no doubt some have nothing more in mind than physical appearance.  The frequency with which the look statement is made about Jewish rather than Swedish or Russian or French strongly suggests that [b]many speakers are in fact saying, "oh you don't look like someone who would be cheap, pushy, clannish, and/or X."[/b]

[/quote]

You are attributing bigoted thoughts to everyone who makes such a statement.  Everyone.

So, prohibiting such as statement as antiSemitic basically means that the burden is one all nonJewish people to refrain from saying anything that a Jewish person might experience as antiSemitic, as opposed to the burden being on the Jewish person not to take anything potentially antiSemitic as such.  Just as, e.g. the burden is on nonJewish people to refrain from saying anything at all against Israel lest the speaker be misconstrued to be an antiSemite.

I get it.[/quote]

I don't think you do get it.  You are someone I would call anti semitic because you clearly are.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics