Reply to Husband is dying - no life insurance or savings, I’m a SAHM

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, you need to clarify the issues re: his debt with an Estates attorney.

One thing that I don't think has been mentioned is that in a divorce, the judge has leeway to apportion debt, even debt that otherwise may NOT be yours legally. You could end up being saddled with debt of DH that you would not be responsible for if married at his death. Something to consider and a bit of a wildcard.

Unless doctors have said he is actively dying and have spoken about hospice, I think you need to pause the grief work look for a job and assume he will go through these cycles for some time. Divorce may not be the "cut off" from debt or connection to his crises (he will get some visitation and maybe 50/50).

I know of a similar situation where the alcoholic has taken up with a string of girlfriends who managed the kids during his 50%. Even with blown breathalyzer tests he still got the 50. And the kids were subjected to randos,  and sometimes their kids, including on holidays.

Focus on what you CAN control and line up an income and benefits as step one. Family Court is a wild card. Never assume they will settle assets fairly, protect kids, etc. And it is another suck of money. If the current situation is affordable, I'd let the table ride for a bit. You have a lot of control re: the kids now that you could lose. If the doctors are speaking of hospice, that is different. [/quote]

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