Reply to If you get Starbucks with your kids present, do you always buy Starbucks for your kids?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My husband and I only get drip or unsweetened iced coffees with milk. I’m happy to order my kids those…but they are disinterested. They prefer $6 iced matchas with oat milk and so forth.

So no, I don’t order them a drink every time I get a coffee.

And they’re ok! Your kids will be ok too! It’s rather alarming to see so many parents willing to buy their children awful beverages just so they don’t feel “sad.”[/quote]

Agreed. I mean, I very rarely go to starbucks or similar so I've never actually been in this situation. But if I were to be the kind of person who grabbed a black coffee or a tea while out running errands, then no I would not always buy my kids what amounts to a milkshake or super rich hot chocolate. These things are desserts. If they want a small refresher or plain iced tea, I would get them that.

[b]There are lots and lots and lots of times that I grab them fast food and don't partake myself.[/b] We don't all need to ingest the same treats every time one person wants one. [/quote]

But that is you making the choice for yourself. Not making the choice for them.

I don't get people who, from lots of comments on this thread, treat their kids like they are [b]second-class citizens.[/b] That's how I grew up and it definitely stung. Especially, since "coffee" is the only part we are seeing here and that it probably extends to other things, as well.

Not getting something for your kid who wants something? Yes, "they'll live." But it's rude, af, and tells them where they stand in your eyes.[/quote]

Quite apart from this Starbucks example, though, how are kids [i]not[/i] second class citizens? Do you really grant them full decision-making status in your household? So they have equal input on what house to buy, whether to put money in CDs or money market accounts, what hotels to stay at on vacation, etc.? My parents never included me on any decisions like that, but I never felt like a second class citizen, just that these were decisions that adults made, not kids.

Likewise, I think it's okay for parents to buy themselves nicer clothes than their kids, fancier phones, etc. It's okay. When kids are adults, they'll earn their own money and decide how to spend it. I'm not saying let your kids go around in rags, but yeah, Old Navy or Under Armour is fine for them and Max Mara is fine for me. They can have my old phone or car, and I'll get the latest model. We are not equals when it comes to money. [/quote]

NP. This is a false equivalency. It's just coffee. [/quote]

But some people seem outraged that a parent is not treating their child equally to themselves at Starbucks. It’s all part of the same philosophy—it seems that some people think a child is entitled to exactly the same quality of life that their parent has, and some don’t. It’s really a much bigger question than coffee—that’s  just how it manifested here.[/quote]

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