Reply to Do any SAHMs regret it because of financial reasons?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I had my second child earlier this year and I’m really feeling the pull to stay at home, mostly because I’m not in love with my job and our home life feels so hectic all the time because my husband and I both have those stereotypical “very busy” jobs.  (I know this won’t be popular but we would keep our nanny for a while so I would have time to devote to household things other than just childcare, so I do think staying home would improve how smoothly our lives run vs. how it is now.)

Anyways, I know there are lots of women who always post “don’t stay at home, your husband might leave you and you won’t be able to support yourself!” Which I hear and I do consider that risk.

But posting this in the money/finances section because I would really like to hear from anyone who ended up regretting staying at home because financial problems became an issue later on (not due to divorce).  This is my main fear in making the decision.

Or if everything worked out for you and your partner financially and you are very glad you decided to stay at home, please share as well![/quote]

I stayed home for a few years, and being financially dependent on my husband is not that comfortable, IMO, even though he is very nice and never made it an issue. It affected my self worth because any money I used for myself felt selfish, somehow, like I was taking it out of the family pot. I think maybe we would have benefitted from laying out a budget in advance (for things like, clothing, haircuts, travel for myself).

I ended up pursuing some personal projects that make a small amount of money (think $10,000-20,000 per year). that helped tremendously, even though we don't necessarily *need* it. It gave me back a sense of financial agency. And now that my kids are both in elementary, doing a bit of work when they were little will help me if I want to get back into more full time work -- it's much easier to ramp up, than to start fresh after a complete stop. There are so many working skills that can get rusty.

If you can swing part time work, even as little as 10 hours a week, it makes an enormous difference.[/quote]

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