Reply to What are the most common ways women waste their 20s?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Marrying right after college is cool and smart. You should be in that mentality.

Sleeping around aka "dating" around is gross, unhealthy, and leads to mental despair.

Your laptop, PowerPoint, Excel, email job is not actually important.

Stop being an alcoholic.

Traveling is a time and money sink.[/quote]

Your first two statements are harsh with a grain of truth and the third is definitely true.

The last statement.... I couldn't possibly disagree more. Travel early and often. Cheaply if you can. Apply for internships, stipends, study abroad, fellowships, short term jobs, ANYTHING and travel to far flung places in the world FOR FREE or cheaply. This is something you can basically only do in your 20s. Travel, travel, travel! Especially when the pandemic hit, I thanked all the stars that I said "YES" to so many opportunities when I was young. Because you never know what can happen. Pandemics, politics, kids, jobs, money. Adult problems. Use your youth to travel. Get lost on a city's public transit system, stay in a hostel, fumble around in a foreign language. Have adventures, DO IT!!![/quote]

Traveling while single (before marriage and babies) is a crutch to avoid reality, waste time, binge drink, eat tourist food, and waste money. Squandering your 20s away being a brainless consumer, seeking likes on instagram. Pointless.

You want to travel, do it in college, study abroad, and if you pursue an MBA, go ahead and take those trips with classmates. But these white collar women age 25 to 35 who think traveling is a personality or a substitute for a husband and kids are lost.[/quote]

Well, maybe fore you. For many of us, it's a way to learn languages, build an international network, visit the Louvre and the Sistine Chapel, learn how to make sushi in Japan, cycle around Taiwan on innovative electric bamboo bikes, dance samba in Brazil with some of the most talented musicians on the planet, see India's Hyderabad transform itself into a global cyber hub from dust, and learn how to turn on every type of shower handle imaginable.  Among other things.

And no, I didn't post any of that on Facebook or Instagram.[/quote]

Unless you’re in the state department, you’re spinning yarn. A “network” of random hookups and passport stamps you think are social currency. When everyone your age is talking about their tween kids and you’re talking about trips, you look ridiculous. Sorry, just being frank.[/quote]

Idk but if I’m at a party I would rather hear about their experiences trekking in Kyrgyzstan than about Larla’s band recital. [/quote]

Sure sure. And everyone just loves the "cool" wine aunt (actually, they all secretly feel sorry for her).[/quote]

I mean it varies. Some people find “epic” travel stories to be pretentious, other people think incessant taking about one’s kids to be boring. And I love my cool triathlete aunt who is childless (not be choice, sadly) who raises German Shepherds. My hunch is that more than one mommy in the hypothetical group appreciates the escapism of the Kyrgyzstan trekking stories as a break from all the Larlo, Larla, Larleigh extracurricular one-upsmanship. [/quote]

I LOVE my childless friends. I love them for themselves, but also deeply appreciate how much they have to give because they aren’t burdened by their own kids. They sustained me through the difficult early parenthood years when they could visit with ease. I love my mom friends too, but my “wine aunt” friends are gold. Anyway women’s value is not defined by their status as wives and mothers, in case that needs to be said. [/quote]

I am a dog lover who raises large dogs, kids (with tons of extra curricular activities, lol), had a career and loads of adventurous travel prior to SAHM with the kids. I guess I’ve had it all, just not at the same time. The trade-off in my case was having kids late (late 30s and 40s). Was lucky with fertility, needed no assistance. [/quote]

Ok good for you? Life actually isn’t a menu to pick and choose from. My point is that childless women have just as much value as mothers. If you judge a woman based on having kids or not, you’re sexist full stop. [/quote]

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