Reply to Pendente Lite Guideline vs Actual Spousal Support (in VA) -- How did it compare in your case? SAHM

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Reply to "Pendente Lite Guideline vs Actual Spousal Support (in VA) -- How did it compare in your case? SAHM"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think it’s reasonable to generalize about the SAH decision. In my larger circle alone I have examples of each of the below I can point to:

- SAH mutually agreed upon and supported by both spouses, WOH closely involved 
- ineffective SAH who quit against wishes of WOH who does a lot at home, deep resentment by WOH
- SAH mutually agreed upon but WOH has become controlling jerk, SAH hides spending and has to ask for money
- SAH who quit with mutual support, years later WOH is rewriting narrative as SAH was unilateral and unwanted 
- Reluctant SAH forced into that position by being traveling spouse who is appreciative 
- SAH who refused to go back to work after kids were in school despite earlier agreement 
- SAH of SN kid where there is disagreement on how to handle SN kid 
- SAH where WOH is so checked out he doesn’t know what grade his kids are in
- SAH who is totally alcoholic and non-functioning, WOH hires nannies and scrambles all the time
- SAH who quit with mutual support, WOH has uncontrolled rage issues and SAH won’t leave kids alone with WOH

All married though I suspect a few will eventually fail. [/quote]

I was these 3 combined:"- SAH of SN kid where there is disagreement on how to handle SN kid " "Reluctant SAH forced into that position by being traveling spouse who is appreciative" and, by the end of the marriage "SAH who quit with mutual support, years later WOH is rewriting narrative as SAH was unilateral and unwanted "[/quote]

I suspect that a lot of marriages phase like that, especially ones that fail.

I know a current alcoholic SAHM who started as a mutually supported SAHM. She is now in and out of rehab. He’d like to divorce but can’t trust she won’t fight for custody which would be dangerous to the kids.

I know another SAHM where her DH is clearly rewriting history and claiming her decision to quit was unilateral; it was obviously not. [/quote]

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