Reply to Elite Colleges’ Quiet Fight to Favor Alumni Children

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If I were a legacy or big donor kid, legacy/donor admissions would make me really question my worth. Every other admissions category comes with a personal challenge and merit. Athletes are exceptionally hard workers (I’m not one btw, but do not understand the unhinged DCUM haters). First-gen did not have the family assistance. URM have faced racism. But legacy and donor kids did literally nothing to merit their admissions. It had to mess with their heads. They must know they are only there because of pure luck. Idk. I can’t understand why people want that for their kids. [/quote]

My kid is a legacy who would not have gotten into the top 20 that he did without that status. It wasn't alone legacy that got him in, but also the multi-million dollar gifts from his family over the last 60 years. The thing is, he worked incredibly hard--as hard as any kid could--at a very intense independent school. He is incredibly bright but has ADHD and there was just no way, despite his 6-7 hours of homework a night, meeting with teachers, ECs, all of it--and probably more than 99% of his peers--that he could get straight As. He got into great schools, just not quite as high as the one that legacy got him. He chose it anyway, with some trepidation. He says that sometimes he feels "imposter" syndrome (I explained that's not exactly what that is), but he knows he worked every bit as hard as his classmates who didn't get in. So why does he deserve it less? He worked harder than most and is highly intelligent. If you think he didn't deserve it, then your argument must be that only those with a very certain kind of intelligence, regardless of work ethic, should get in. Is that what you think?[/quote]

He didn’t work harder that most. You need to dispense with that lie. He certainly did not work harder than a kid who has to work a 20-hour per week job in addition to getting higher grades than your DS. He didn’t work harder than an athlete who kept up a crushing training schedule while getting grades similar to your son’s. He didn’t work harder than a kid who had to get higher grades while also negotiating the college application system for the first time in his extended family.

Your son has figured out that his admission was based on reasons other than his own merit and accomplishments. You are bizarrely trying to create a fantasy world where that is not the case, whether to protect him or you, I don’t know. But your entire post reeks of self-delusion. Look, your DCs admission was bought and not based on his own merits. He sees it (a credit to him). It is you who are telling yourself fantasies to avoid the truth. [/quote]

Oh, I forgot to mention, he has a job and played 3 varsity sports all through high school. I know you want to wish that our kids are all jerks--and by the way, wishing evil on an 18-year-old is demented--but most of them deserve it. Period. [/quote]

So he studied for 5-7 hours a night, played three sports and held down a job? Sure [/quote]

I’m beginning to think that this poster is literally delusional. Maybe she doesn’t even have a son. [/quote]

No, she just has superpowers, because she knows that her son is superior in intelligence and as a fine human being to everyone posting here today (and their kids.)[/quote]

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