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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Best thing I did was send my daughter to a private school that does not allow cell phones.

They have limited computer time as well

I have heard parents rationalize kids have to have cell phones for school shootings. Just wow [/quote]

Curious as to how old your daugther is? A boy in my kid's class that did not get a phone until high school is now on every bad site out there.[/quote]

What does that have to do with anything? You don’t think staring at a screen all day from K-12th has repercussions?  So the boy is on all the “bad sites” at age 15 instead of 8? How is that a bad thing? LOL

Not the PP, but my daughter’s school they must be locked in the lockers. If seen (not even being used) they get AM detention, meaning the parents have to drive them in an hour before school starts. It works amazingly well. [/quote]

I have not idea why phones are not banned in all public schools.  There is absolutely no reason for them and they are a huge distraction.  I was SHOCKED when our elementary school started to allow them.  And why?  Because moms wanted a way to reach their kid?  Like um no.  CALL THE SCHOOL
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I am also surprised they are not banned at least during school hours.  The only reason you would really need one is to tell a parent a practice was cancelled or something and you could do that after school is over and just wait for them to pick you up.[/quote]

Cell phones are banned at our school. But kids are on them at home all the time. The issue is all social communication happens through the cell phone. Texting, FaceTime whatever. Friends live some distance from each other…with no way to get to each other..(parents work, or are otherwise busy and can’t drop them off). Also kids are over scheduled with activities, so can’t devote blocks of time to see each other. So they text and play games (apps) with each other.

I’d love my kid to invite friends over I but she doesn’t want to. It’s not what kids do! :-([/quote]

Friday nights are friend's night at my house.  Cell phones are placed in a bowl and the kids have free range of the entire basement and backyard.  Sometimes they watch movies, play board games, just hang out and eat.  We have the classic Wii down there and that is used a ton too.  They aren't into shuffleboard as much but we have that new trendy hook game and a giant magnetic dark board.  Also one small section of wall mirrors and a cheap karaoke machine.  One night they learned how to play poker and had my husband teach them and player dealer/cashier.  We have a firepit so they do smores a lot too.  And my god, all of these 12-13yr olds still love to swing on our swing set.  I added solar LED lights to it.  Am considering a ping pong table for under the deck or a trampoline for this summer.  [b]My daughter has my old Canon digital camera so they take pics and after the night is over she uploads them and sends them out to everyone so they can add them to social media.[/b] If anyone needs their phone, they are allowed to come upstairs and use it at anytime.  They just can't bring it down the basement.  Most come up 1-2 a night for a few minutes each to text a parent or probably check messages.  But you would be surprised how little they want it when no one else has it.

They also bike to the pool a lot in the summer.  On their own.  I haven't been to the pool since she was 9 or 10 years old.  Her and her friends go alone.  
Our neighborhood started cul de sac nights where kids ages 10 and older meet at certain cul de sacs to play capture the flag, jail break, kick the can, etc... No parents allowed.

So yes PP it absolutely can be what kids do.  They want it and they need it.  You are doing a disservice otherwise

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I was all in until you got to the bolded. Sounds like lots of fun and I commend you for your efforts. But while that is a huge boost to the mental health of those who are invited, as soon as those pics go up on social media, it makes a dent in the mental health of those who weren’t. This is why social media is such a huge part of the picture. Adults can’t handle feelings of being left out, can you imagine being 12 or 13 and having to feel like everyone else is out there having the best time?[/quote]

And THIS comment.  This one right here is EVERYTHING wrong with this generation's parenting.  You are blaming teens that spent a night socializing without phones and may or may not repost some digital pictures the next day - as a horrible thing.   :shock:   And you also blamed the mom hosting these events.   :lol:

And newsflash - I can absolutely handle feeling left out and have parented my kids to understand it happens all of the time too.  Stop coddling your kids while judging others.  Your kids will grow up to be just like you.  Sad, judging, and always the victim.  Raise your kids to be resilient and make their own fun, instead of blaming a mom who offers some fun to her daughter and a few friends.

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No, I agree with the PP. I guarantee the DD of the poster who hosts these (otherwise excellent) get-togethers flaunts it. Asks all her friends to tag her on social media and do some hashtag. I bet the DD enjoys the likes and comments the next day even more than the party itself. That’s the only reason she walks around the party like a damn paparazzi instead of… actually participating in the party.

Having a party talked about at school the next day is completely different from having all the pictures in your feed so you can look at them over and over again, having them pop back up at the top of the feed every time someone comments on it, etc. I personally have not experienced it (and have young pre-social media kids) but I can imagine how it would be devastating. Yes, a smart teen with self-control will turn off notifications, unfollow or quit social media altogether. But it’s easier said than done with these developing hormone-filled kids. No, not everyone has to be invited to your party, but you don’t have to flaunt it FFS. Teach your kids some empathy.[/quote]

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