Reply to Husband following 20-year old on social media…

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why does it make the wife look rediculous? All men look at hot young women. It's not a reflection on the wife. It's human nature.[/quote]

Yes, it’s normal to check out hot people. It’s not normal to stalk random employees of businesses you frequent on social media and follow them so you can check them out online. The difference seems obvious to me but, apparently, it’s not? [/quote]

Huh, I am a man and I have a lot of people I work with and who I don't know that well who friend me on Facebook or follow me on IG. I never saw accepting that invite as disrespectful. I have no idea who follows my wife and I don't care.

You are telling me your entire social media feed is only close and platonic people? So no ex boyfriends, etc?

This is all so fascinating.[/quote]

Yeah, it would come off as creepy if you sought out the cute cashier at your local grocery store and followed her on Instagram. She is not an ex, colleague, or acquaintance. It’s really not the same as someone you don’t know well from work following you.[/quote]

+1 People seem to not be getting that this is entirely about context. It is precisely the level of closeness and platonic-ness. An ex is a known quantity. Someone your spouse works with but might harbor an attraction to is too, to an extent (and at least they have a platonic reason for following). Likewise, following some hot celeb you lust after is no big deal because you aren't close at all.

But someone you see regularly, don't work with, your spouse has never met, with this specific age difference and NO other reason for following on social media? It's gross.

I think one reason I instantly went "ick" is that I know enough early 20s women to know what this person's instagram looks like, and there is absolutely no reason for a 40 something married guy to follow it. I guarantee this woman is posting selfies, party pics, vacation pics (but of the kind of vacation you can afford as a 21 year old receptionist, so... party pics and selfies), and then some kind of silly stuff for color -- dumb memes and screen grabs, the odd pic of her food or her nails, etc.

What possible reason would a 41 year old man have for looking at these photos? Other than wanting to impress/attract/bone the person posting them. There are none. He's not looking for cool party venues in Ft. Lauderdale or a good manicure shade recommendation.[/quote]

Respectfully, this is just insecurity. Which is normal but you need to acknowledge it.

Basically, if she were 55 and unattractive you wouldn't care[/quote]

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