Reply to Sleeping in on family vacation: what is reasonable?

Forum Index » Eldercare

Reply to "Sleeping in on family vacation: what is reasonable?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]I have not read this whole thread, but, damn!

We take vacations like this every year with my in-laws (and about 20 other people because my husband has 4 sisters so I am the only DIL, and I do think there is a different dynamic with DIL and daughters).

My in-laws pay for EVERYTHING. The reality is, that this is their vacation. The other reality is that my FIL is actually the inflexible one, but due to gender roles and dynamics in their marriage, my MIL is the "bad guy" trying to police everyone around his annoying inflexibility. I try to remember this whenever I get annoyed with her.

After some hiccups the first year, this is how I changed things so I could have a nice vacation:

My husband is in charge of getting our kids to ALL family meals/activities with my ILs. Dinner together is the most important meal to my ILs, so I show up for that, otherwise, if I want to sleep-in, I sleep in. If I don't want to kayak, I don't kayak. As soon as we have the "schedule", I pick one thing a day, that I am going to do with my kids, and I let MIL know as early as possible by email/text. We are doing ropes course on thursday at 2p. She has been early-warned and now actually appreciates my organization (she, and others, are welcome to join us of course).

I wish we could pay our own way to end this dynamic, but we have not figured out how to do that. My husband's sisters only want a free vacation, and their husbands just go along with it, like men do. I put the onus on my husband to deal with everything, since it is his family, and things are much happier.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics