Reply to Why does my partner pay $2400 a month child support for one kid?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

The point is for many of us it doesn't cost anything additional to have kids living in our home.  You don't need a larger residence.  We have a 1000 square foot house and do just fine in it.  You want a larger house.  There is want vs. need.  If you as Mom choose to have a nicer lifestyle than you can afford, you shouldn't expect Dad to pay for it.  I choose to spend my money on my child so they have a nicer lifestyle than I do.  Its all about priorities.  You may need to live in a 3000 square foot house paid for by your ex but reality is 1000 is just fine.[/quote]

And for many of you, it does!

Want and need is meaningless.

Child support is pegged to income, not to some mythical "want vs. need".   It's not about how much a child need. It's about the fact that the state has decreed that your child is entitled to a certain percentage of your income, whatever that income is.  If a non-custodial parent makes a million dollars, the child will get a percentage of that.  If that parent makes 80K, the child will get a percentage of that.  These two children eat the same # of calories a day and can be fed for the same amount, yet their child support numbers will be vastly different.  Want and need does not come into it.  
[/quote]

Beyond all that, a child has a right to support by both parents. I can’t see why a loving parent would want their child to have LESS at the other parent’s home.[/quote]

Same, but I understand why shitty stepmoms do. [/quote]

Oh, bugger off.

There are plenty of shitty Kim’s out there who don’t give dad a say and then expect the stepmom to just keep her mouth shut when [b]$ that should be going into their household/future[/b] is being chucked down the drain by the ex’s poor decision making/life choices. [/quote]

And there you have it, in a nutshell.

"This money should be mine and instead it is going to somebody else. Waaahhhh."

The stepmom can keep her mouth shut or not. It doesn't matter.  She's not the party to the child support action.  She has to make do with whatever is left. [/quote]

Did you actually read what I wrote?

This is about toxic mothers who think they get to have all of the say AND are entitled to the max amount of money they can squeeze from the dad.

I get that the law is the law. And if there is an ability to truly coparent, then I have no issue. But if mom obstructs the dad’s ability to express his opinio/weigh in on matters, then I think he has every right to mitigate the amount of financial hemorrhaging he is subject to - within the law.

And, in our particular situation, my opinion most definitely matters to DH. We have very difficult discussions about these matters - and he actually cares about how these decisions affect our future.  [/quote]

so your husband had decided to reduce the amout he supports his kids to punish his ex wife. is that right?[/quote]

Nope.

He’s paying exactly what the calculator says he should pay.

But you can bet that we have conversations about what financial support looks like once cs is over. [/quote]

so no support for college because you don’t like their mom? that’s cold. [/quote]

Did I say that?

No. But support once a legal adult is now on his and, in part, my terms. Money won’t just be drained out with no boundaries and no input from their father. Which is the way their mother always wanted it. After 18 it is a different discussion. [/quote]

you have a massive chip on your shoulder and sound like you’re salivating over the chance to manipulate with money. [/quote]

You really have a one sided way of seeing thing and an even bigger chip on your shoulder.  Once kids turn 18 they can negotiate college expenses and their relationship.  If they choose not to have a relationship with Dad, he's well within his right to say no to college expenses.  As an adult at 18, if you can decide to terminate a relationship ship, that's ok but don't expect someone to financially support you.[/quote]

This depends on the child support agreement.  It's increasingly common for them to provide for college funding and/or support until age 21, specifically to guard against deadbeat parents.[/quote]

This is not true.

However, CS doesn’t typically end at 18, rather graduation from high school or 19 if that doesn’t happen.
 At least in Virginia.

My child turned 18 last week, I still owe support until June (I am also paying for college but that’s not in the CS agreement)[/quote]

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