Reply to Anyone completely blind sided by a cheating spouse ?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]OP — I would be happy to talk with you directly but don’t know how to send a personal message. DH and I have stayed in the same house. What you are experiencing is equivalent to post traumatic stress. It is horrible, devastating, one of the very worst things that can happen to you. I am seven months out and struggling so much every single day. It takes years to reconcile and what is required from the cheater is enormous because they have to be the one to change themselves and help heal you at the same time and they were not equipped before this which is why they cheated. In our case, the OW’s husband knew about it — they are young and have some version of polyamory or something like that. So he knew and was ok with it. [b]All fo them knew I did not know and was being deceived. [/b]Also, you need to be sure to take care of yourself physically — may need to assume sex was unprotected — not shocking when you think about the mindset. I immediately got tested. I know that might be hard right now but call your doctor. PM me if you know how and if you want. So sorry. Also think about who to tell if you might want to reconcile. Some people are so opposed. What you want is emotionally attuned support for you. I had one girlfriend who was the absolute best for months and then several others also.[/quote]

These people suck at polyamory. Just...for the record. I'm not poly, but I'm well aware that a core tenet is ETHICAL non-monogamy. [/quote]

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