Reply to Husband leaves room to talk to MIL

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
I disagree so a son should talk to his mother 5x a day or when he is spending quality time with his wife and you wouldn't describe that as a boundary issue? There is such a thing as cutting the cord. [/quote]

If he's talking to her in the middle of what you call "quality time", then he doesn't see it a "quality time" and it's not that special to him.

If they talk happily five times a day, then that's what works for them and it's none of your business.

[quote=Anonymous]
Nope I also disagree not aboht whatever he wants because if he is talking about our marital issues that is about me so therefore I do have a say what he discusses involving our marriage. [/quote]

He's a grown man and can discuss whatever he likes with whoever he likes.  You can ask him but you cannot stop him unless you tape his mouth shut. Where do you get off thinking you can control who says what about you? Life doesn't work that way. Certainly if my son wants to discuss his marital issues with me, I'm not going to stop him!

[quote=Anonymous] Yes again how is it not a boundary issue when mil is specificity telling my DH to exclude me from family dinners 2x a month? You really think it's acceptable for DH to oblige to this request of his mothers and put her first and say to me his wife sorry hunny I'm going to go have dinner with my actual family 2x a month and you're never invited? [/quote]

A better question to ask is this: why doesn't she consider you good company?

[quote=Anonymous]You honestly don't see at all where there is lack of boundaries with my MIL. You read on here all the time that there needs to be boundaries with MILs and its important for the husband to put his wife first. But nope not in this thread. Its perfectly acceptable for mom to call 50x a day and to exclude his wife on a consistent basis and I just have to accept it because his mom doesn't have any boundary issues just me. Maybe I should head over to DWIL message board because here we just promote momma boy behavior.[/quote]

It would be a lack of boundaries if your husband objected.  Since he doesn't, I don't see how it's a lack of boundaries.  His boundaries are open wide to is family.

Do you have to accept it? I mean you don't have to accept it, you can always divorce him.  I don't see a gun to your head keeping you in this marriage.  Lord knows you waited for it long enough. [/quote]

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