Reply to SAHMs, how did you decide when or if to go back to work

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "SAHMs, how did you decide when or if to go back to work"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I roll my eyes at the comments that seniority brings flexibility. Not at those non mommy tracked high powered jobs. My first job in finance the senior women partners went home for two hours to tuck their kids in and then back out to wine and dine clients. Staying up till midnight or one and then waking up at five again. My second job in consulting all the partners flew all over the place. Interesting how the senior women quit after awhile. In big law if you are not selling as a partner you are kaput. I know male partners away from home two weeks at a time.

So either you are in a shitty mommy tracked job if you want to see your kids at all or you are in a job that’s not exactly bringing in the dough and have some drudgery. So don’t pretend that you are so much better than SAHMs.[/quote]

Keep telling yourself this.  [/quote]

You can’t handle the truth. This is reality. Or share your high titled position and salary at a prestigious company and your schedule.[/quote]

NP. I don't have a great title. I do work for one of those companies that everyone wants to work for because they are known to be really family friendly (they have awesome flex policies and 6 month mat leaves!). I make $150K. But I'm middle management and when if I describe my job you'd probably be bored. But I enjoy it, make good money, it does stretch my creative and intellectual muscles a little, I have some good friends there, and even though DH is the breadwinner, it's contributing to retirement and college funds. I don't think people are saying we all have awesome jobs and are getting rich from it, but life is not black and white and you don't have to be a CEO to enjoy working. It's not CEO or miserable factory worker working 3 shifts. There's stuff in between.  [/quote]

I earned more than 150k my first job out than what you currently make. Now my husband earns multiple what I make out my first job and gives me the flexibility to spend time with my kids and pursue my hobbies. All I am saying is at that pinnacle this argument about flexibility, you give up some to get some. Your job is not worth it for me to make the trade off and leave my children with the nanny and fight with school days and stuff. The only women I have seen make it work flexibly have their own businesses, which is what I intend to pursue once my children are older.0[/quote]

So strange. I don’t own my own business and I have a ton of flexibility. It’s really not all that uncommon in the dc area.  I don’t believe you made more than 300k in your first job and didn’t really follow the rest of your post. We don’t have a nanny because kids are in school and we both WFH so much. Of course we don’t make 7 figures, but also aren’t in a dilemma where one parent works all the fine and doesn’t parent and the other parent is wanting something else. Hence OP’s post. Shrug.[/quote]

Your experience is not relevant to the OPs because both you and your husbands income combined does not equate to her household income from a sole income earner. At that point different household decisions are made.

300k while a nice sum of money means that for you to achieve an upper middle lifestyle you need to work. Also your job option making 150k while middle aged is not comparable to what some of these wealthy SAHMs careers were before they gave it up. So give up ragging on SAHMs for their perceived lack of flexible options when your own job would probably be considered a mommy tracked job. Another person could criticize you for not living up to your potential and getting a “mommy tracked” job. [b]I earned nearly 200k out of school and my friends would never dream of middle management in their 40s only earning 150k.[/b] Even Vice Presidents get more than that. So your “flexibility” is because you don’t have one of those elite jobs. At the senior levels of these elite jobs they work constantly, even more than their juniors. [/quote]

That’s great.  I also worked in finance and made a similar salary.  Unfortunately, your salary is now $0 so what good did it really do you?  You slaved away making pitchbooks for nothing.

[/quote]

Not nothing. Because at my household income DH brings that kind of inflexible job is not appealing, neither is a 150k job. So your  attack is meaningless. I am trying to point out the smugness of the poster that places so much emphasis on how seniorship brings you flexibility and looking down on the SAHMs that enquire with her about flexible jobs. Turns out her situation isn’t even in the same ballpark as the OPs and her flexible job is a step down from those wealthy SAHMs used to have. Also if she didn’t work she won’t have even near the lifestyle the OP has. Also she keeps mentioning telework, so telework allows her to take her kids to school outings and do activities and doctors visits? I wonder whether her company knows she is doing that on their dime. [b]If my DH didn’t make the kind of money he did maybe I’ll be still working 24/7 at my finance job, sorry you still have to. [/b]
[/quote]

Yikes.  You’re very defensive about not having a career.

[/quote]

Rich coming from someone who told me I slaved away over pitchbooks for nothing. Enjoy your late nights and early mornings and never seeing your children. Or did you downsize and got a mommy tracked job too? Way to undercut other women by proving that "talented" woman doesn't have what it take to reach the top of industry. See how that argument works?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics