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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]

That's a very good question and I suspect it varies by individual preference. What would you consider a sexless marriage to be? People have posted here describing years without sex. Those people would laugh at the OP, who by his own admission has sex once a month. One number I heard was that if a year has gone by without sex, the marriage is sexless. My best friend, during her divorce, was told that she had to be apart from her ex for 1 year, including sexually, and that if they had sex even one time, it restarted the clock. So at least some individuals and states recognize one year as a significant number related to sexual contact.

But go ahead and keep being mad at ME because your spouse isn't satisfying YOU sexually.[/quote]

I've heard it bandied about that the "clinical definition" is less than 10x per year. Which doesn't sound unreasonable to me. Sure, you can argue that there is sex so it's not "sexless." But I think this ignores that when people use the term "sexless," it's a shorthand for "sex is rare enough to cause problems or signify something problematic in most marriages." There can absolutely be couples who are content with sex once a year. And maybe it's unfair to call their marriage "sexless." In most marriages, I think less than 10x per year goes beyond personal preference and reasonable accommodation into territory where one or both spouses would be acting reasonably if they're unhappy with that frequency. (This is not the case, for example, with the spouse who is unhappy with his or her wife because they only do it twice a day. That unhappy spouse is being unreasonable.)[/quote]

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