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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For those of you that spank, how do you teach your children to not hit other's in anger?

If Johnny steals your child's ball on the playground, Johnny is wrong, is it ok for your child to hit him?

How do you explain "don't hit other kids, but I will hit you when it suits me"?[/quote]

I just responded to another question re: spanking.  We use it sparingly, and we don't hit her in anger.  We haven't had any issues with her hitting other kids.  There's a fundamental difference between parents spanking a child for infractions, IMO, and hitting another child on the playground.  In cultures where there's a lot of respect for parents, and spanking is routine and NBD, this doesn't feel like a contradiction.

I would expect an association between actual childhood physical abuse and playground violence, but not between occasional spanking and playground hitting.[/quote]

You can't think of a single other punishment that would get across to your child how serious this matter is?  Without having some sort of cool,calm and collected hitting time?  I have two kids.  I have WANTED to smack them for sure.  Kids can be infuriating.  But anytime it's gotten to that point, it's been made crystal clear that I am the one doing something WRONG.  And I am the one who needs to figure out what will speak to my child about this issue in a way they will understand.

I think spanking is incredibly lazy parenting.  [/quote]

The appropriateness and effectiveness of a punishment is not determined by how difficult or easy it is to implement. In other words, the fact that it's simple and straightforward is not a reason to avoid it; likewise, just because something is more difficult and complicated doesn't make it inherently better.

I don't think anyone here is talking about "wanting to smack" their kids. But I agree that, based on the fact that you did, you did well to refrain from doing that in your moment of anger.[/quote]

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