Reply to Rant re DH's family

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So the siblings were the squeaky wheel and demanded that the family pay for their education. Was it really that simple? Why didn't your husband demand the same? Perhaps you should be mad at him for not asking.[/quote]

He thought it was wrong at the time. When his siblings did it he brought it up and was told flat out that his wife (me) could afford to do it. After that, he had very little contact with his family for years, but eventually he got over it. I never could. Maybe that makes him a better person, who knows. [/quote]

How does DH's family get the impression that you can do it? DO you flash it or do you tell them how much you make or own? I am an immigrant, I work hard for where I am. My parents never paid for my college because of their finances and when my husband and I got married, my student loans became his responsibility. I never asked but he took on that responsibility. I don't think he is resentful since my income is equivalent. I never would think my husband would resent it, however, I have never asked them and I think it is unreasonable for him to be mad at my parents becuase they are not financially stable. When your DH made the choice of getting married, he can be on his own financially, and independent of his parents. You took that responsibilty on yourself.

I wonder if you are resenting that your DH doesn't make as much and you have to work harder with a child. You probably have an idea of what your life should be now and it isn't, so you are resentful of the past.
 
Nothing great will come to you if you are so resentful. If your child is having a great time during gatherings, guess what he'll also remember? Mom is sitting there being mad and distant. When he grows older, he'll remember and gravitate towards family that your child likes and frankly your child would not like to be around you. So, let it go, you may not like his family but do it for your child so that good things come to you in the future. I really do believe in Karma.

I do not like my MIL or BIL at all.  I still teach my kids to respect them and I try to have a great time and act like nothing happened in teh past because if my kids see that I am negative to their grandma and uncle,  they may think they can treat me negatively in the future.[/quote]

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