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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I posted earlier but here is an example of where I'm having trouble detaching.  A few months ago, I told DH it feels like we never have fun and can we each come up with a few ideas for things we think would be fun to do together.  I came up with about 5. He had two, one of which included doing something with our child (which is not the point) and the other was seeing a movie that is in a genre he knows I hate.  He is also the type that if he doesn't want to do something or finds it beneath him or uninteresting, it is VERY obvious.  That is why I wanted his ideas.  I'd go along with pretty much anything where we could actually interact with each other.

It sounded like he'd be ok with a cooking class. Great!  I asked him to select the type of food that interests him most and put it on the calendar.  Three months later, it never happened.  He then tells me a week or so ago that yeah, he just doesn't have ANY time to plan these type of things so if I want to do it, I'll have to plan it.

How do I detach from him not wanting to spend the time, effort, or money into doing something just for fun?  How can I make it fun now and not laden with pressure and resentment if I now plan it?

I just don't make any plans with him now. It doesn't feel like that's a complete solution though.
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Man I don't know. I would find it very hard not to take that personally and as a slap in the face. It's so cold and indifferent to your feelings. Is the relationship generally happy and good aside from this issue?[/quote]

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