Reply to I caught her on a date with another guy.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
What?  You mean women aren't expected to be mind readers, but men always are?

Listen he didn't say his gf was stupid.    She had to know that dating other guys wasn't acceptable or she would have TOLD him she was going to date around.   Only a woman would attempt to justify that behavior, which basically was cheating behind his back, but she got caught.  If she didn't know it was wrong she would have told him so and broke up with him,  not beg for forgiveness and exclusivity.

You can have all the conversations about exclusivity you want but when it comes right down to it if a woman wants to step out on you she will find a way to rationalize it.   A woman decides whether or not the relationship is exclusive in her mind, the man better be a mind reader and understand what she s thinking, or it's his fault.

How the fuck hard was it for this bitch to pick up the phone and tell OP she was still seeing other men-if not simply telling him in person?

It's obvious she wanted OP to think they were exclusive.   If not why was she ashamed when he caught her cheating ?[/quote]
That's now how it works.  One announces exclusivity when one wants it to happen, and the other party needs to accept. No one is supposed to announce that one is seeing other people.  Non-exclusively is the default unless exclusivity has been brought up and accepted by both parties.  If a man isn't exclusive with me, I certainly don't expect him to pick up the phone and tell me he's seeing others. That would be weird.  And has never actually happened. And yes, if one wants an exclusive relationship (man or woman), but hasn't negotiated one, that person has no right to be upset. [/quote]

This can't be correct since OP's gf didn't announce exclusivity, yet only after caught in public with another man, did she claim she had wanted it, but put the burden on OP to read her mind and somehow "know" that she wanted it, without her saying anything.   But that's exactly what Op did.  He correctly assumed she wanted to be exclusive.  Except her actions were not consistent with what she claimed to have wanted- after she was caught.

In effect what you all are saying is that if a man doesn't read her mind correctly to figure out what she really wants without her saying it, she will punish him by fucking other men.

If a woman wants to be exclusive, according to you, she will say so.  Ops gf didn't say so so that means her actions of fucking other guys was consistent.   So in both word and deed.she didn't want to be exclusive.  What has changed other than her being caught with another man? NOW she says she wants exclusivity but that's only because it's a deal breaker for OP if she sees other men.

But by both her words and actions she's basically told him she's not an exclusive kind of woman.

They were not one and done.  They had sex several times, met the parents.   Only an imbecile, liar, or very narcissistic person would not tell their bf they were going to multi date after all that-IF that is they placed any value on the other person's feelings.

All these women saying default is multi-fucking *UNLESS some sort of formal conversation occurs are plumb nuts.  If you don't want to fuck other men, then you don't.   It's not something that emotionally healthy people use as a loophole to cheat.  Because let's face it, she only decided exusivity was important after being caught.  [/quote]

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