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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm a southasian American who, after having lived in the U.S for over 20 years is pretty baffled by the western perspective on extended family. I have seen my friends and colleagues speak at great length about troubled relations with their brothers and sisters and mothers and fathers and in laws. Most times, adult siblings only speak to each other occasionally and see each other at Christmas. Adult daughters can't stand their fathers and do not see them unless its an emergency. Siblings cutting each other off etc. Married couples not wanting to have their elderly parents live with them and more.

In the east, we LOVE our families. We live and would die for them. As an adult daughter it is a great privilege and blessing to me that my elderly parents can live with us and that I can take care of them in their old age. I love my siblings and we all live near each other.

Why is it so different in the west?[/quote]

+1000000000. I am a private school educated north easterner. I am engaged. And we are in couples therapy for this very issue. I cannot figure out what my fiancé is missing. My family after my fathers death has always been close. My mother had w mental health crisis. My fiancé was terrible (withholding, uncommunicative, punishing) to me and to her. I will never stop being enraged at this behavior, no matter how much I let it smolder undetected. I don't get this attitude. Out therapist took his side. Is the world insane? I am a white female late 30s well off north easterner. [/quote]

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