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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here.  Interesting to see the different perspectives.  A couple clarifications:

My sister was never an addict or anything close.  I think it would be fair to describe her as a pothead though.  It was a lifestyle thing, not a dependency thing.  She was a bit of a slacker too I would say.  But not either of those things anymore.

I do not have a problem cobbling together 50k.  Getting $$ from mom isn't make or break.  I just don't think gifts this big should go to one sib and not the other.  It is a matter of principle.

I am not resentful of my sis at all.  I am happy for her to be buying a house and really settling down.  She's a good person, and I am happy for her.  She is also responsible with money, so I don't think she'll be back needing more handouts.  This is a one-time thing.  Again, my issue is that mom is investing a big piece of her resources in one child but not the other in order to even out our lifestyles I guess.  I feel like kids should get the same help and be left to their own devices.  Exceptions would be for drastic situations like overwhelming medical bills.  [/quote]

I think I would be annoyed with the "evening out of lifestyles" too.  Seems like the harder you work/the better you make your own life, the more your mom thinks she has to give to your sis to even things out.  If you were living in an apt in an affordable neighborhood the bar for your sis would be set lower I guess (?).  [/quote]

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