Reply to Love my wife, but she's getting seriously fat....

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Love my wife, but she's getting seriously fat...."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I think the poster who suggested you try hard to support your DW in areas other than just eating/exercise was right on. If she's anything like me, she's focused on everything but and comforting herself with treats during a stressful week. Once I felt I had the latitude and time to focus on something other than work and parenting, the weight started to come off again. And of course, now I'm pregnant again.[/quote]

I'm the OP, and maybe it's time for this thread to die...there's been a lot of repetition.

For the record (for those who've wondered)

- I'm not an adonis, but I was 5'11" & 165 when we married and I still am today; I've got my hair and I am pretty good looking...none of that has changed.

- I am the default parent
- I do the majority of the cleaning and laundry
- I do all the cooking
- The baby sleeps for 10 hours uninterrupted
- Despite still working my own 50 hours a week in a supervisory job and being the default parent, I manage to squeeze in workouts during my lunchtime.

In short: the issue is not lack of support for my wife; that's mostly a distraction and excuse making.

More things we know:

- I'm a jerk
- I'm a horrible and insensitive person
- I should be blind
- The baby is all that matters
- I'm an asshole who's going to dump her at the next opportunity

I wanted to vent - I'm not happy about being on the verge of being repulsed.  I legitimately fear that will have an adverse impact on our relationship and I both love her and love our family.  I don't care if she's a 3% body fat hot-yogi or not; that would be fine, but I know perfectly well that is not who I married - that is who I dated before I met DW and it just isn't that important to me.  The looks didn't make up for the rest of the hassle.

I do appreciate the insight about breast feeding.  That makes complete sense.  That was constructive and informative information that helps me better frame my expectations, and makes it easier to "be patient".  I do not feel my wife, already dealing with another human being feeding off of her, should be toughing it out through massive hunger pangs and cravings.  I'm OK with it.  I'll still take her out for Ice Cream as a treat.  She went out and bought lunch things (this week!) that she likes (not quite my salads) and started packing her lunch, precisely because I think she knows it's too hard to try to resist the french fries and the pizza and the soft serve if she goes out.  [/quote]

OP, you are an honest man. Speaking the truth is not fashionable in America sometimes. Love and support your wife. But if her weight is something she can work on to improve, why can't this be a honest and respectful discussion? I gained about 25 pounds after giving birth to two children. My husband and I openly talk about this. I welcome any tips he gives me for weight management since he knows a lot about exercising.  I also vent frequently to him how difficult to lose weight and admit I often don't have time or will of power to follow through my exercise and diet plan. This is what family is all about, to discuss things openly and honestly. [/quote]

I don't think you're a jerk, OP. I'm glad that the hormones discussion gave you additional patience (I found that convo informative for my own reasons and was grateful for it). Good luck to you. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics