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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Interesting conversation.

I never wanted or tried to have biological children (I'm on birth control, actually) but we recently adopted. I was worried about bonding - hell, I know people who birthed their (very much wanted/tried for) biological children and didn't feel a bond for months. But I IMMEDIATELY attached to my son. I spent three weeks with the biological mom before the baby was born and she was more interested in facebook than the baby - we're still in touch actually, facebook friends, etc. and as I had an immediate skin-on-skin contact, was first to hold my son, etc. when he was born, I don't think there's much of a primal wound inherently. I think there's definite loss associated with adoption, but my son's bmom held him a couple of times and he hated being away from me and wasn't particularly comfortable with her. I think some of that is because she really didn't spend any time with him those first few weeks other than to get photos  of her, her daughter, and us and our son. And there's a massive amount of ignorance (and a little neglect and abuse) in her household - so it's clear that everyone involved (including her family) thinks we're the best bet for him. We'll see them again, for sure. I feel no threat by them - I don't believe a baby can have too much love in his or her life :)

That said - my son's biological father is a scary guy and he signed without knowing our names which makes me grateful. He's a violent felon and I don't know how we'll handle it if our son wants to contact him before he's an adult. I have photos and his information though.[/quote]

But the pp's clearly was. Adopting a troubled child from foster care may be altruistic. Adopting a newborn just isn't.

Think outside the box.  Not all adoptions are domestic adoptions.

Why would you not at least attempt bio children? I'm not judging just wondering your reasoning? [/quote]. Some people don't adopt as a substitute, the do so because their are so many kids who have no one to love them without adoption.  They do it because their hearts are bigger than ours.[/quote]

that's not really applicable in the case of adoption of a healthy infant these days. [/quote][/quote][/quote]
Once again, think outside the box.  There are healthy infants all over the world in need of homes without support systems like we have in the US.  Not all adoptions are domestic and conditions for these children can be atrocious.[/quote]

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