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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t understand why 50/50 on assets plus child support isn’t what you should expect.  Alimony is an injustice to any person.   The marriage is over, but then financially everyone pretends like it isn’t?   [/quote]

Except that one spouse is forced to absorb all the downside of supporting and sacrificing for the other’s career opportunities while the other harvests all the upside. You can’t make it be over unless you have a magical time machine that resets the spouse’s age and opportunities to where they were before they had to stop working. Alimony recognizes the impossibility of that.[/quote]

Why is it always assumed that the “sacrificing” spouse furthered the other spouse’s career? I worked in government, my career trajectory was pretty much set. In my specific situation, my ex was more of a detriment to my career. Not only did I work full time, but I also did most of the cooking, cleaning, child-rearing, etc. Yet I would still hear the same argument about what my spouse “gave up,” when in reality they could have gone back to work at any time during the marriage and chose not to.
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Because they do. My DH has never taken kids to doctors, any other appointments, parent-teacher conferences, any school functions, sport practices, nothing at all. Doesn't know teachers, coaches, doctors. Has never met any. Doesn't cook nor clean, has no idea about house management, repairs, taxes, mortgage. One of our kids got accepted to gifted program and I had to drive them to-and-from as this wasn't covered by a school bus. When kids were little, he regularly stayed in his office until 11 pm so that he didn't have to do anything. I wish I didn't get married and had a career instead as I did before getting married! No, I didn't know nor did we agree that everything will to be done by me.  [/quote]

I could have written this post + he is constantly out of town for his work. And yet I work full time. I feel very stressed and exhausted all the time. I look at my calendar and its all full with work meetings, doctor's appointments, school activities. I even have to put stuff like *go grocery shopping* on my calendar because ill just forget and there isn't anything to eat. I cook a lot too as I just cannot eat junk food or take outs. 
The work situation is also not great. I do not have a career, just a job to pay bills. He makes 3 times than me. I have some health issues too. [b]This capitalistic society is not good for anyone, either SAHP or working parents.[/b] I am constantly in survival mode. [/quote]

With all due respect, some of us working parents with spouses who do their share aren't struggling. I get it that it's easier to blame the system than to look inside how you got where you are, but it's not necessarily the truth. Why did you have multiple kids with someone who wasn't willing to do anything with them?[/quote]

I wanted to have kids. 
In real life I keep this all to myself. I do not complain because I made my choice and I have to live with this choice. I am still grateful for I have as most of the country is not that lucky. I am myself an immigrant and my perception of this country was all well to do people. Which is not the case. Many many Americans live in or below poverty. The choice to stay home or not for them might be non existent as there are basically no jobs in sone locations. [/quote]

If there are no jobs, you move.  The issue is really the cost of child care.[/quote]

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