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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think one clear message on which we can all agree, form this whole incel thing, is:

- boys need to be far more educated and raised as feminists.  It is the antidote to toxic masculinity.  I am talking to you, boy-moms.[/quote]

It is more complicated than that. I have to be sympathetic to their perceptions since THEY seem to be bearing the brunt of the mistakes and bad behavior of generations of men before them. My boys know and have been told about the inequities in history (not just towards women but other cultural groups and races). They know to stand up for people. But all they know is the life they are living and struggling through themselves.

For example, my oldest's college roommate (boys) worked for weeks on a presentation for a prestigious internship position.[b] There were spots for 2 boys and 2 girls from their school. There were about 20 boys and 3 girls who applied. [/b]His roommate did not get it despite being very qualified (grades, ecs etc) but one of the girls who got it had actually ran out of the presentation room in tears due to nerves. This really upset my feminist-raised ds on behalf of his roommate. It isn't going to make them the next Joe Rogans or anything but it doesn't engender empathy.

It is easy to say raise them that way but they face so many other factors and situations outside of the home especially as they get older - peers, reality, internet, other adults and leaders, etc. [/quote]

Weird example, as it’s just a numbers game here. This shouldn’t have anything to do with feminism or empathy—just, sometimes life’s not fair. You can’t always get what you want, and all that.

It feels like everyone is constantly looking for someone to blame for every single disappointment, rather than shrugging it off and looking for a different opportunity.[/quote]

I see this example went over your head. In their minds the competition should be for 4 positions total without gender specifications. They know intellectually why there is such a thing but when they see how they are disadvantaged personally and in a specific way, it is not reality to think a 20yo guy would say  "ok well I understand that since women my grandmother's age would not have had the same chances as men 60 years ago, then my classmate who is a girl should take this spot even though I performed better than she did." It doesn't help the girls either. And it makes men/boys more susceptible to victimhood thinking, deserved or not. Even as a 'feminist' who has raised awareness and non-entitled thinking in my boys growing up, I can see why they might feel this way.

[/quote]

If it was really 20 boys to 3 girls applying, then this must be a massively male-dominated field in which women have been passed over in favor of less qualified men for decades. The old boys club and all. Perhaps the way it made him feel will help him understand why they instituted gender specifications for this.[/quote]

Or, less girls are interested. I don’t think girls today are impacted by their grandmothers’ opportunities. They seem smart, motivated, and not intimidated. If they aren’t interested, they won’t apply. If they are interested, they will.[/quote]

Just WOW. It's fewer girls not less.

I know we are going backwards in every way, but it's still amazing to see it unfold right in front of you. I'm sure you think black people weren't interested either. Right?

[/quote]

How are we going backwards in every way? Aren’t girls out performing boys in high school and college? If the girls are interested, they’ll show interest. They aren’t afraid.[/quote]

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