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[quote=Anonymous][/quote]But I wasn’t going to just not have a 2nd kid, and I don’t care what the posters here have to say about it. The circumstances are not optimal, but I would personally still choose to be born into them if given the choice between that and not being born. [quote]

The above exemplifies why the OP is unfit to be a parent: because she's a total narcissist who wants what she wants even if it's not in the best interests of her soon-to-be-born child; and the fact that she is one explains how the pieces of her narrative fit together. Some posters were bewildered by the OP’s declarations of imminent divorce should her current situation remain static, pointing out concretely how life as a single parent would make things more stressful, not less and how such a choice would be irrational. [b]Well, narcissists do not think logically. [/b]

[b]Narcissists also don’t take responsibility for their own limitations and work within them. [/b]While I don’t doubt that there is a certain amount of volatility in the OP’s line of work, the problem is clearly her anxiety and her inability to manage what for 99.9% of people would be a very doable situation. Were I already a parent of a healthy daughter in addition to having a HH income between 320-520k plus rental income and 2 years’ worth of savings and a spouse with a steady professional career and flexible hours that allow him to be a hands-on parent, I’d acknowledge that my anxiety was the reason for my stress; that I couldn’t handle the life I already had as it were; and, while perhaps disappointed, decide to channel my energy into being the best parent I could be to the child I already had instead of needlessly dragging another kid into it “just because,” thereby exacerbating the entire situation and increasing the misery for all involved (because let’s face it, does anyone think the OP doesn’t take out her rage on her spouse and even indirectly by creating more tension within the household, on her existing daughter?)

[b]Narcissists denigrate those they perceive as thwarting their desires, distort facts to suit their own narratives and project themselves onto others.[/b] Some of those who do the most meaningful work within society are underpaid. Academics are included in this category (although anyone who thinks that 120k is a “hobby” salary is clearly super entitled--one of the defining characteristics of being a narcissist--and severely out of touch); and the ones I know work an average of 60- 70 hours a week per calendar year. Moreover, no one who prioritizes material wealth goes into academia. OP’s reference to her husband’s career as a “hobby job” is therefore not only belittling and anti-intellectual to boot but also makes me skeptical that we’re getting an accurate picture here.

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