Reply to Sad about no longer being attracted to DW

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I feel you.  I don't understand why people pretend attraction is controllable.  You can control your behavior but you cannot control your basic physical responses.

I am 50 with three young kids.  I weigh about 30 pounds over my wedding weight.  I don't deny that I am fat and less attractive.  If my DH is less attracted to me because of this, it is his own deal.  I do not control his sexuality. I freely admit I gained weight because of various life stresses, less time to work out and eating as if I'm still thirty and a gym rat.

It is what it is.  Your feelings are your own as long as you do your duty.[/quote]

Yes people can control who they are attracted to. It’s highly socialized. Some societies are more attracted to fat people. Its all in your head.[/quote]

Absolutely not. I don't find fat people attractive at all - wife here. [/quote]
NP
They are right. You might have a different attitude being born in another place/time but our culture has a few different popular body types thanks to media and conditioning. The window of what you'd instinctually be attracted to is broader than what you end up finding attractive thanks to culture. Looking at old, even ancient, art tells us that.[/quote]

The body type that has historically been seen as attractive, throughout the times, is what today we'd call height/weight proportionate.  The difference between Botticelli's Venus, ancient Greek statues and today's beautiful women is maybe one size. The times in history when fat women were seen as attractive are outliers. [/quote]

Have you considered something other than European standards of beauty?[/quote]

Ancient Egypt

[img]https://alexandrakinias.files.wordpress.com/2010/03/img_09781.jpg[/img]

Ancient China

[img]https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5cfffdde9f31270001b78d96/ec051a95-d7b3-46c6-b493-627980e0656b/Chinese+Beauty+Cover+2.png?format=1500w[/img]

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