Reply to Can anyone please explain the mindset of parents who allow “failure to launch”?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Bumping this because of a new wrinkle. I'm one of the PPs with a "failure to launch" brother in his 50s. I asked my parents why they just bailed him out, yet again, of a financial mess. Apparently my father asked my brother what his plan was if they didn't bail him out this time, and my brother said he'd kill himself. Do I think he'd kill himself? Probably not. He loves his kids too much, but my parents opened their (very meager) wallets upon hearing that. Ugh.[/quote]

how manipulative.

Did the call the police and report a suicide threat? that would be a new wrinkle to the bully bail out bro [/quote]

And if they don't they get called uncaring and enabling. Some people just don't have it in them to live well. We've got to stop placing blame on others. If someone is toxic to you get away from them and live your life but then stop making them bail you out of life.[/quote]

Huh? The way above was an update about a manipulative, toxic, failure to launch brother who bullies and threatens his parents until they bail him out again with what little money they have left.

Calling the police for a suicide threat IS caring.

Bailing out is enabling. And not care or caring. Who cares what a psychopath calls it. [/quote]

My point was that mean out of control people like this who are mean and demanding will often blame the people they are asking help from and will create a picture that the people being manipulated to help has to help or else they are bad people. That they are owed help and ridicule. While you understand that it's just enabling to keep helping, most of the world doesn't see it that way. The mean person gets very good at throwing a pity party for themself. Even if they see the destruction, others at the very least they don't want to have to deal with the iasues themselves and become mad at the targeted people anyway.[/quote]

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