Reply to Would you confront your husband/wife's Emotional Affair lover?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hmmmm. I am not sure about the whole husbands looking for a mess because it makes them feel powerful. I think it's more like smelling out someone who is sad and lonely and will take them up on it. That sad person is just as likely to  e hot as not, but of course, wives who have been cheated on will dispute this and husbands who have btdt will say their wives are soooooi much more attractive. Very reliable, right.[/quote]

What do you mean reliable? In an EA the wife often knows the OW, as she is often a co-worker or mutual friend. Was in my case. I could see a one night stand or fling, having to believe the husband when he says "she is not as attractive as you honey" but for many of us, we actually know the woman and can vouch for her attractiveness. In fact that is why it got so far with my DH, I just blindly trusted the whole thing because [b]the woman is just so not his type and was not the woman you think your husband will risk everything for. In his case it wasn't about looks but the way she made him feel when he was at a very low point[/b].[/quote]

As a DH I can tell you looks count for so much less than you think.  Show me someone who is a good listener, supportive, and has empathy and I will show you someone who is affair material.  The OW makes the man feel important and worthwhile, period.  We are not looking for a supermodel to do that.[/quote]

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