Reply to DH won't use any inheritance for a house

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi, OP.

Look at it this way. Since he refuses to commingle inherited assets, you can do the same with any more gifts and inheritances you receive in the future. So, in a way, his refusal could work to your advantage. You are just following his lead and not comingling.

I suggest you only use assets from the marriage to buy this new house. Of course, equity from your old house is partially a gift from your parents so that’s a bit annoying. But if your husband is asking you to get more money from your parents to fund a bigger house when he refuses to give up any of his inherited assets, that does sting.

Also, if you do commingle gifts and inheritances in the future, you could probably talk to a lawyer about drawing up paperwork making clear that, for example, equity you are putting into a house is not a marital asset and that you will get it back with interest if you divorce.

Do you work? Does he? Who makes more?[/quote]

I second this approach. BTW, OP, I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all. Would a post-nup help in this situation, too? You could state that anything you and your DH come into the marriage with will leave with you if it ends. This may put your DH at ease if he’s concerned about divorce, which he may be since that is what he saw from his parents.[/quote]

What makes you think the DH actually wants a bigger house or would be willing to sign that post-nup?  Based on OP's input, I don't think DH has ever brought up divorce, it's just speculation from other jaded DCUM spouses on here.  If OP goes to DH with a post-nup, wouldn't that be seeding the thought of divorce in his mind?  Is that what she wants?   IMHO, that would be a bridge too far.. probably make DH even more paranoid about money and only make things worse.

It's best for OP to encourage DH to see a financial planner and maybe a therapist and let him decide what's best.  I do agree that should should have a say in marital savings, just not the inheritance. [/quote]

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