Reply to SAHMs that never return to workforce?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]People who have the luxury of this choice - staying home or working full time - should do what they want, OP. For many if not most women, it is not even an option.

The financial aspects are important but aren’t the only important thing to consider. I stayed home for several years. I wish I hadn’t. I think I was depressed, and I knew a number of SAHMs who were medicated for depression and anxiety. I’m happier working, but that’s just me. Watch for depression and anxiety, especially as your kids grow up and your role changes, and as you hit perimenopause, which can wreak havoc on your mind and body.

Just enjoy your life. All we really have is now. :)[/quote]

I agree in general with your post, but... do you also tell working people to watch out for signs of depression and anxiety? PLENTY of working women rely on antidepressants and anti anxiety meds, too. It's not like depression is unique to SAHM's.[/quote]

It's not unique to SAHMs, of course, but working a 9-5 imposes some order/purpose/social interaction on your everyday life that can be helpful.  As a SAHM, you have unstructured days, you're never really "off the clock," but at the same time there's not a lot of external validation for the (very hard) work you are doing, and it's easy to become isolated from other adults if you don't make an effort to socialize.

I know myself and even though I sometimes fantasize about quitting my job so I can focus all my energy on my kids and home (instead of feeling like I am failing at both work and home all the time), it would be a bad choice for my mental health.[/quote]

This really isn’t the case. As a SAHM, I structure my days myself. I find routines and there are a multitude of chores and management issues I deal with. And there could be no better purpose in life than to serve my family. Even if the worst happened and my DH and I divorced, I would never regret that for a moment.  Sure, I’m never off the clock, but I find most working people aren’t anymore either. I think the rise of Blackberry put that to an end back in the day. [/quote]

You do realize not everyone is wired like you, right? I’m a SAHM right now due to a my son’s medical condition, but I did much better on a more structured schedule. Yes, one can make a schedule for oneself, but not all of us are wired to deal well with a lot of flexibility/ambiguity in planning. Given some of the chaos I’ve seen with some other SAHMs I know, I don’t think I’m the only one. It’s great that SAH is seamless for you. It’s not that way for everyone.[/quote]

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