Reply to Driving teenagers from a party to another house after they have been drinking

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I don’t think you needed to overreact but you should have driven them to their homes, not to another party. Yes you could be liable.[/quote]

But liable for what?  She served them no alcohol.  If an Uber car drove them, is the Uber driver liable?

[/quote]

This was the OP's question.  I agree, there's no obvious risk of liability here.  I also think those that are saying, don't punisht them, but just bring them all home are failing to recognize that doing so would have the same impact as a "punishtment."  They only other thing I think would have been a good idea, is to confirm there was an adult present at the second house and to text that adult saying "I think there may have been some alchohol cosumed by some in this group. . ."  That said, I've had a 17 year old, and it's perfectly normal for kids this age to make their own plans and for parents to not have each other's numbers.  In this situation, you could have insisted on parental contact.  But I don't think not doing so opens you up to any liability.  I don't think every adult that runs across underage drinkers has a legal obligaiton to intervene to stop them from drinkning.  [/quote]

And bringing them to the party when they are drunk is the same as condoning teen drinking and encouraging it. And we aren't talking about every adult, we're talking about a parent of one of the drunk teens and his friends.

And by sending  that text she's admitting she knew the teens were drunk[/quote]

It's a tough call, but one that I have recently navigated.  I don't think driving them is the same as supplying alcohol or allowing them to openly drink in your home.  I would have driven them, but not done the other two. You have to decide: Do you want to know when they are drinking or do you want to be in the dark?  I felt better able to keep my kid safe if she felt able to tell me when she didn't want to drive. I'm certain she didn't tell me everything, but she could ask for a ride somewhere without me saying "why. . . are you drinking, then you can't go to that party on Homecoming night." She knows I don't condone underage drinking, but I'm not going freak out if she has a drink senior year on homecoming/prom night. I have friends that supply alcohol to their now college kids, and party with them on vacation.  No fing way I would do that. [b]I will tell you, there are kids of very strict parents that are the heaviest drinkers,[/b] host parties when their parents are out of town, end up 18 in the ER and call a friends' parents rather than their own.  Do you want to be that parent, or do you want to know what's going on.?[/quote]

You actually do condone her drinking,  and the bold is false.[/quote]

Well, I'm not going to name her.  Didn't run in my DD's cricles in HS, but I knew the parents from ES.  I considered telling them what I'd heard (parties at their house when they were at the beach at which kids were drinking so heavily that their friends who at that time only had drivers' permits drove them to the hospital and left them there, huge bottles of vodka attempted to be snuck in to other ppl's houses,  girl sneaking out of another parents home to that had hosted a sleepover but forbidden the girls from leaving and returning to prevent them from sneaking alcohol in), but another mom told me the DD considered her parents' abusive and was frigthened of them if they learned of her antics, so I kept my mouth shut. [/quote]

The studies say otherwise,  You can live in denial all you want to, pp. But you are condoning your daughter drinking. and the majority of  kids with parents who are strict with alcohol aren't throwing booe parties and ending up the ER, but keep telling yourself whatever you need to to justify  allowing your 17 year old to get drunk on a regular basis.[/quote]

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