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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Unfortunately my kid is one that has asked me “Mom, am I dumb?”. It was heartbreaking to say the least. Kids are affected more than a lot of parents want to admit. I’ve heard from too many parents that their kid has asked them something similar all because of the obvious divide. [/quote]

Yep.  In second grade, after the AAP decisions went out, it's all the kids were talking about at lunch the next day.  "Are you in AAP? No?  Why not?  Are you dumb?"  It was a horrible time for my child, and the other children who weren't going to be in AAP, but who saw many (most) of their friends excitedly talking about how they were "smart" and were going to be in the same classes the following year.

Really, a horrible system for everyone involved.  Kids who get in think they're somehow "smarter" than everyone else, and kids who don't get in (often, with very similar scores), are made to feel lacking.  I agree with the PP who mentioned the character shapes at CRES.  What a bunch of baloney.
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The principal sent an email to parents to not have their kids talk about who got in or not at school. A week ago, like others, we were notified about AAP results. My child got accepted my child has NO IDEA who else got in. I asked her if she knew of others getting in. She went to school in person twice since announcements were made and I have learned nothing so far, which means at least in that cohort, the kids were not talking about who got in who didn't.

Anyway, my experience with the school so far has been very good. I have too many things going on outside of being a school parent to be an "involved parent" at school. I was frankly a little worried if being a passive almost invisible parent would affect my child's chances with AAP. I didn't try to curry favor with the second grade teacher (to try to get better GBRS ratings) or even send a single email or anything about my child applying. I didn't contact the AART either. I'm just saying that while some helicopter parents angling to get their child in AAP might be more visible to others, I'm guessing there's a mix of parents. In first grade, parents had to get several emails encouraging people to volunteer as the second room parent, as they apparently had only one volunteer thus far. That there was no competition about who gets to be room parent already tells you there are plenty of chill parents, and that "those parents" that gives others a bad name (that have the combination of perhaps being an entitled + demanding + tries to put pressure to the school to get their child advantages by using perhaps their position at the school, from room parent to a titled position in the PTO or those that use large donations as pressure) are in the small minority.

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