Reply to Families who can afford private but go public, why?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It makes people feel bad that they can’t [b]give their children the best.[/b] That’s why they lash out. 
Whatever. Most kids are fine in public. [/quote]

This is the attitude that is repugnant and may be why you experiencing "lashing out"--the idea that there is a universal "best" in these options.  And this thread is about people who can afford private but don't choose to, so obviously it's not about the case of whether they can give their kids a private school education, but rather whether they think it's the better option.  We came to a view that public is "the best" for us--not on the basis of finances-- but wouldn't impose that view on others.[/quote]

And some people value education above all else. Some think it’s a waste of money. 
Everyone is different.[/quote]

And some don’t agree that valuing education = private school. Including many of us who went to them.[/quote]

So don’t send your kid to your old school.  I suppose you don’t paint everything with the same brush?
Look, I think public school can be great, but let’s not pretend this isn’t about a tit for tat amongst the 1%.
It’s more than a little rich to read posts smugly mentioning their  GS10 school zone, and all the travel and enrichment they can provide. Nothing irks those posters more than the neighbors that also bought in the same (or nicer) neighborhood, do all of the travel and enrichment, AND easily throw down another 40k for private school. 
Ya gotta spend your money on something. Some people can just spend on everything. [/quote]

DP. This thread is about the people who CAN afford to send them wherever they want, and still choose public. Money is not a variable in this discussion.[/quote]

The answer to it seems to be, “because we can afford the best public school district, and we think it’s superior to any private.” It is about money. No one has said, “we can afford Sidwell but figured, nah, let’s send the kids to a 60% FRL high school.” [/quote]

Nah, it's not about being the best public school district. Some people may be, but I'm not. It's just that school doesn't really affect life outcomes very much. My parents actually did send me to a 50% FRL (assuming that means subsidized lunch folks) high school even though they could have afforded the equivalent of sidwell  (different state) and I still ended up with an ivy league phd. I don't know that I'd be comfortable with THAT level of discrepancy simply because poor kids create more violence and disruptions in the school, as I have experienced first hand. But to say that this is merely a choice between the tippy top publics and private is false. I'm fine with an above average public because I don't believe there is a meaningful benefit to private over an above average public. And that's assuming we are talking about a top private. [b]If it's an average private, there's not even a point in talking about it.[/b][/quote]

I had the same feeling about many private schools. But I'm still curious, why in the world are people paying 20-40k per child, or even more for their kids to attend an average private? What drove them to that type of decision? Is it just those amounts of money are so little to them that they don't mind handing it over in this area? Or is that those schools do such a good job selling their services that they've got it figured out to a science as to how to get well off people to (in many cases unnecessarily) pay that much for a school nobody has even heard of? What could make it worth it? With that much yearly cash on hand, someone could hire multiple high end private tutors to come and teach any subject or art that a kid would possibly want to learn in the comfort of their own home..[/quote]

So--I'll bite.  My husband and I are public school products that did very well.  Our kids have been (and will be) public school products K-8.  What was the tipping point was how our County has gotten worse and worse and more crowded since our oldest started K way back in 2007.  We saw a difference when the elementary;/MS started using iPads for almost everything, when the SOLS became the barometer for what the children were learning--and if it wasn't on the SOLs it wasn't important.  We saw a decline in the number of essays or papers are youngest children have to write in comparison to our oldest.  Teachers do not have the time to grade the written word and there was less attention to grammar.  I got increasingly fed up with all of the focus groups and info sessions with ZERO action as our kids sat in trailers.  As an area public school kid I am not as highly impressed as people that come from other areas and rave on and on about ''the schools".  My children get straight As, in the highest level courses--HS in MS and, frankly, I have never seen them work or even study.  Add in, we never raised our kids in religion or our faith and we would like them to have a deeper understanding of religion (whether they practice it or not) because, to me, that is part of a well-rounded education.  I am sick of the bureaucracy of the County.

We can afford private.  It was something I used to swear I would ever spend $ on because I thought it was unnecessary.  I changed my mind over the past few years.  My kids do very well in all subjects---STEM as well as liberal arts, etc.  They test very high.  I have no idea what they will want to do or major in down the road.  I do know that they better by able to write well, no matter the field.  I am a STEM professional that spends 95% of my time writing.  I decided not to go into the lab/research.

So that, in a nutshell (and not paying attention to grammar/punctuation as I write this:)),  is how I ended up here when I thought I would never pay for private.  Also, we bought in a very good school pyramid--but we bought more for the location/walkability and amenities more than just the public schools.  They were part of the package.  I think in the deep recesses of my mind--private HS was always a possibility because it was something neither of our parents could afford, but we can without sacrificing other things.  I think a very good education is possible at our HS, but I want more focus on certain elements lacking and a smaller environment.[/quote]

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