Reply to My adult step-daughter wants to move in with us

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This is why I never want to get divorced. My children will always be welcome in my home.[/quote]

Drug use? Drug dealing?
Nothing but online all day, every day, in their rooms or the basement, hoarding dirty plates or leaving them in the living room to clean?
Stealing from family members? Having friends over that steal?
Recurrent verbal or physical abuse of you?
All this while refusing to attend therapy or admit there is a problem?

I mean, you can say MY children would never do that, so I wouldn't be in that position, but this ignores that even the best kids from the "best families" can deal with mental health issues, including depression (sometimes turned outward as anger), anxiety, addiction.

It's easy to make blanket statements. They sound nice and make you feel good, even superior, and they don't get challenged, until they do.[/quote]

Pp here. My adult brother lives with my parents. He is bipolar and suffers from addiction. I have no doubt that he would be homeless or in jail if he wasn’t safe at home with my parents. He has a job my parents set him up with.

My children will always be welcome in my home. If they were having a hard time in college, I would help them. This is the difference between a mom and a stepmom.[/quote]

There is a big difference in the situation you are describing.  Your brother has a serious mental health and addiction issue.  He probably uses to self-medicate as bipolar is very hard to treat.

This adult child has a home, she has housing.  She is having a temper tantrum as her mom told her to get a job and she's refusing.  Instead of getting a job, she now wants to go live with Dad and stepmom.  Moving to a different house with the same expectations will not help the situation.  She has never lived with her Dad.  Dad needs to support Mom and both need to stand firm on the job issue.[/quote]

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