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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's easy to demonize me, I get it. statistically, half of you are cheaters.  Half.  I'm not proud of how my relationship with my husband started, but I didn't set out to destroy his wife and children.  Yes, I'm ashamed I slept with a married man.  We worked together for 15 years before we became more than just coworkers.  He was in a sexless marriage for years, living like roommates. His wife was on medication for depression since having kids.  My own marriage was nonexistent, my ex worked 60 hour weeks and when he was home was disengaged.  Both marriages were dead long before we started leaning on each other for support.  The affair was a mistake. If I could do it over, we would have ended our marriages first.

I don't live in the home my husband lived in with his ex.  She kept the house.

I genuinely like my step kids. They are good kids. I don't have experience with tweens, I know I'm in over my head. I get that his son is angry, but I don't think that is an excuse to blackmail his stepmother with threats to tell my kids that I'm a homewrecking whore.  Come on, none of you would want your young kids hearing that phrase or your tween spewing that phrase.

Yes, I'm going to push for an adjustment in the custody schedule.  DH's ex only communicates with him through a coparenting app and wont acknowledge the topic of custody.  I'm confident I can get my ex to switch weekends at least, so then there is less overlap and each set of kids gets time with their biological parents without the other kids around.

for the few of you who have been decent in your responses, thank you.

[/quote]

Ahhhh.... so your side of the story is that your DH was justified to have his affair because his wife was sick, and you were justified to have your affair because your then-DH was working his tail off to support his family. The family you wrecked.

Yeah, you were right to leave all of that out initially. It just makes you sound worse (although I didn't think that would even be possible).[/quote]

New poster. I agree 100 percent. OP, you wrecked a family, taking advantage of someone who was depressed and mentally ill. You don't feel an ounce of regret, which is really sad.

If his kids know the truth, your kids should know too. I think you should sit them down and tell them the truth before someone else does. [/quote]

OP literally wrote “the affair was a mistake.  We should have ended our marriages first.”  You’re projecting.[/quote]

She isn't because OP does NOT feel regret. She thinks they should have ended their marriages first not because of the hurt they caused but because she now realizes that not doing so means the in laws will never welcome her, her stepkids will never accept her, and she's living in a state of constant paranoia of what a 12 year old will tell her kids about her. She's unhappy about all that but still has zero concern at all for how much damage they've done to a LOT of people. [/quote]

There's zero evidence of any of that.  You're still projecting and you should seek help.  [/quote]

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