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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why did you marry him?[/quote]

Because ADHD impacts multi-tasking, and frequently people get married before getting promoted to upper management, before having kids to pile on more responsibilities, before being homeowners, before having to care for elderly parents, all at the same time. And when life becomes a little complicated, this is when people with ADHD start not being able to cope. [b]A young single person with no responsibilities expect to hold down one simple job will rarely exhibit any symptoms.[/b]

[/quote]

This. Plus, f[b]amilies of the affected often pick up their slack before marriage, but dump it [/b]all on the new spouse after the honeymoon. That’s what happened to me. My [b]in-laws stopped paying credit card bills and checking overdrafts [/b]that I never knew my ex had. [b]His mom stopped calling him to remind about appointments and deadlines.[/b] I wish it had been grounds for an annulment under fraud. [/quote]

To a large extent this is my untreated ADD husband, but the situation with his untreated ADD brother is much worse. I wish they'd get help but damn if I raise this issue.

The co-dependency between the brother and parents is constant. His mom pays his bills, lends him her car, sends presents on his behalf, helps his job search. Then his father does his graduate homework for him, buys him rental properties in his name to work on together, pay for his airplane tickets, figure our insurance for him. They both make excuse after excuse for him every time he is fired, or wants to quit, or missed a bill, or got dumped, or wants to try a 3rd or 4th one-year graduate degree in something totally different. He is always the victim, you know, so they must help him feel better.

Every year or so they ponder when 30-something bro will get married, despite never holding a job down for 15+ years now. [/quote]

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