Reply to At what point does a favor become a burden?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]This post and the responses stuck with me last night. I don’t understand why everyone jumped to camps where either the OP or the twin mom is an awful person. The cynicism and judgement is saddening.

It absolutely is a burden to spend an extra 10 minutes every morning helping out another family for several weeks. Tougher still if the OP doesn’t feel any gratitude or close relationship with the other family.

But I can honestly say that it would be an honor if I were in a position make that small sacrifice to help a neighbor out. Especially if that neighbor is recovering from a c-section or otherwise struggling in the weeks after birth. I’d go to bed sleeping better because I had an easy opportunity to do something nice for someone every day. Every morning already you’ve improved someone’s day - that’s awesome!

As a result of this post and the responses, DH and I talked for while last night about how isolated families are and how hard it is to ask for or receive support. We’re going to look for more ways to proactively volunteer to help our neighbors or the families of our kid’s classmates. We both work full time and struggle with the usual time-money-energy balances, but we have yet to regret any of the small ways we’ve extended ourselves in the past.[/quote]

XOXOXOX

you are wonderful. I hope we’re neighbors. Not because I need something, but because that’s true community. Thank you for sharing your insight and intention. [/quote]

+1,000,000  We were that family, struggling to juggle a child with a life-threatening illness and an older sib who desperately needed to get out of the house and do an after-school activity. Unfortunately, we couldn't swing transportation. It was just too hard and complicated to get the sick one out. A neighbor two doors down with a child in the class that started right after my kid's offered to pick mine up and bring her home at great inconvenience to her (bringing my kid home and then running back to get hers). At first, I politely declined. Despite knowing and fearing our isolation, I was then, and still am, awful about asking for help. But this woman insisted and so I caved. It was, and still is, the single kindest act anyone has ever done for me and our family. OP, I know it's an inconvenience, but this family is going through a big transition time. And it's not forever. You don't know what's going on behind closed doors or really how hard it is with TWO babies. Some day you may need help, too. [/quote]

Your guilting of OP is entirely inapporpriate.  OP has done more than her share of this woman's work.

You notice, your neighbor insisted, while this is too much for OP.  Why don't you get OP's contact and go transport her neighbor's kids?

God you people.  I swear.[/quote]

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