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[quote=Anonymous]I'm going pose an idea that is a bit unusual.  Why not let your couples therapist write the script and make YOUR DH tell the truth to the kids if/when they begin to ask?  With you there, of course, so you may be part of the discussion.  My thought is this:  you are not responsible for how he is perceived since the explanation will be from him, it is somewhat punitive to have to explain his poor choices to his own children, and you will effectively be following the model of letting him foster the relationship between all 3 of the children.  He's going to have to tell that little girl, too, at some point.  If your kids end up resenting him after this conversation that he takes ownership of, it will be because of his words and his actions, not yours.  You can have a follow up conversation with your kids, and should to tailor your part of the narrative, but having him tell the kids and explain how they have a half-sister gives him the ultimate responsibility, accountability, and ownership since HE created this extraordinarily difficult situation for your kids and your family.

If you are not willing to do that, then I would consider going the route of keeping it as factual and simple as you possibly can and tell them yourself.  Wish I had more advice and wish you luck.[/quote]

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