Reply to I wanted to have sex with DH today

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]During the day I was feeling it and thought DH and I would have sex tonight.

Then I spent an hour driving home from work, ordered things from amazon during commute for kids' bday party this weekend, picked up the dog, picked up the kids (5 and 3) one of whom had a meltdown because her snack was in wrong container, came home to other dog, fed dogs, fed kids, facetimed with 5 different relatives for 5 year old's birthday, wrangled kids to bath and bed, cleaned playroom, cleaned books off their floor, cleaned dishes, cooked dinner, cleaned up more dishes and pots after dinner, finished decluttering house, broke down boxes and gathered trash/recycling to put to curb, and washed a load of laundry.

It is 20 minutes to midnight (I live in central time) and I am just now sitting down for the first time all night. During all that, DH came home with balloons for the kids, exercised, had dinner with me, watched tv, answered some work emails. He went to bed about 20 minutes ago after a shower.

I don't even know if I'm posting to ask a question or vent or what, but it's disappointing and frustrating. [/quote]

- This happens all the time but somehow suddenly that day he was going to magically change and not do what he always does.

- You can only change your own unrealistic expectations.  What's the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result.

- You definitely have the martyr / supermom thing down.

- No need to facetime with that many relatives. Let me guess? They expected it/would be disappointed/it's the right thing to do, your kid would cry, etc and so on.  So you prioritized their feelings and being a "good mom" in their eyes and skipped out on your own family time.  Birthday wishes are just as wonderful before or after a birthday and don't need to come all at once.  Think of it this way, if you ended up divorced would your kid say "well thank god my mom made sure I facetimed 5 relatives on my birthday instead of worrying about her relationship with my dad."

- Buy a couple big plastic bins, to declutter quickly before cleaner, toss the stuff in the bins, add lid, stack in room out of the way.  I am willing to bet once your DH sees you declutter this way a few times, he will be happy to help.

- Toss boxes in the garage, they can be broken down some over day.

- Ask DH to throw in load of laundry.

- Get a dog walker.  Forget about taking the dog somewhere. that's just complicating your life.

- You are just at the beginning.  Your life will get craizer as your kids get older and there are more activities.  Learn to stream line now and prioritize. 
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