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[quote=Anonymous]My kids range in age from their thirties to their teens. I've raised them all "attachment" style, with family bed, extended breast feeding, and having them with us as an integrated part of life. They've always been very loved, but also not treated like special snowflakes. I've expected them to pitch in as valued, competent members of our family, from the time they were little, and nurtured their interests and talents, and tried to teach them good values. I respect them as individuals, and we put human connections first, while keeping boundaries, independence, and privacy. So far, they've been turning out to be people I really enjoy being around. And they are all very private, but we feel close.

Because of dysfunction in our parents, we've done a lot of work, and with insight and the healthy boundaries we work to keep in place, our dynamic with them is reasonably okay. We do limit how much we see them, and it takes a lot of work to keep the in-laws from trying to control us.[/quote]

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