Reply to Son only cousin excluded from nephew's wedding

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[quote=Anonymous]Short version: Yes, OP, you’re overreacting.  You don’t even mention in your post if attending an out of town wedding for his much older cousin is something that your 9 year old son even wants to do.

In any case, I’m chiming in with the many voices urging you not to take an age cut-off personally, and not —even to yourself — link the invitation to your past generosity.

In your place, I would get whatever nice gift I would have given anyway, and have it shipped.  You and your immediate family can then decide who wants to take the trip for an adults only wedding, then plan from there.  Make sure that your son understands that even if he were able to attend the wedding and reception, it’s not likely that he would be able to spend much time with his cousin.

Most issues with kids and adult only weddings have to do with either behavior, expenses, or —rarely — rules about kids in places where alcohol is a focus. I say this because if those are the issues AND your son REALLY wants to go, it might be easier to wrangle a seat for a well-behaved 9 year old to the wedding ceremony, especially if it’s held at a church, than to the much more expensive reception where plates, seats, and heads are carefully counted. So I’d consider that an option. Your husband and son can leave to do fun things after the wedding service, and you can bring your son a slice of cake.

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