Reply to DH wants "open relationship" after my affair...

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hmmm...well, OP, you really set the table, didn't you? You opened "pandora's box"--and this is what you get. You "want your old life back"?--forget it, it's gone. Your marriage may survive, and you may be happy again, but your marriage will never be the same. Sadly, you should have considered your marriage, your daughters, and your husband's love before you fucked the gym stud.

Your husband now has all of these "mind movies" of you, his loving, wonderful wife, the mother of his children--spreading her legs and letting some gym stud fuck you silly, every "furtive" chance you got. Don't worry about *you* being "tortured" by whatever anger and demands your husband has for you, now. He is going to be tortured every day for the rest of his life with you with the haunting, unbidden thoughts of you, moaning as the other man pumps his cock into you. Your husband will be tortured about wondering if you really desire him--instead of secretly yearning to be in the gym stud's arms. You have mind fucked your husband forever.

Now, you can help your husband heal, and learn to trust you and love you again, but *you* need to do the work. Get counseling; apologize and show total remorse and devotion to him. If he wants the affair details, give them to him. Such may help him reconcile the fears, the unanswered questions, and the mind movies. Be honest and transparent with him in *everything*.

You may have a chance at rebuilding your shattered marriage into a happy one. Paradoxically, experimenting or embracing an "open marriage" may be a temporary part of the rebuilding process. Whatever it takes. You betrayed your husband. You offered yourself up to another man, and gave yourself to him, over and over, and over. Your husband is absolutely destroyed.

You need to love him, and commit yourself totally to the marriage and to doing whatever it takes to rebuild it into something new.

Centurion[/quote]
Are you the husband? You sure sound like it. Should she lick his shoes clean also?[/quote]

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