Reply to Feeling resentful after sacrificing for my DH’s career

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Reply to "Feeling resentful after sacrificing for my DH’s career—how to restore balance?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not to derail this, but when are we going to stop teaching our daughters to take less lucrative careers? It feels like these situations are always the product of marriages where the man’s earning power, based on what they do for a living, is so much greater. If one person stays at home it’s not going to be the $1 million plus earner, if there’s just one of those. It’s not the values driving the decision, it’s just the economics. [/quote]
Many of us just by nature had less lucrative careers and ended up with partners whose earning potential was 10x higher than ours. I had worked for 10 years in my career before meeting my husband who made next to nothing when we met. For our quality of life, I stepped back a bit and it worked for us for 7 years, until it didn’t. He makes 500k now, and can probably make 7 figures in the next 5 years. I was a writer at a nonprofit. So if I want to go back to work (which was always over 40 hours/week), he would have to majorly step back in his career in order to do 50%. So instead of HHI of 500k, it’d be HHI of 300k. I don’t know how to solve this. We can’t take that hit if we want to send our kids to college. We don’t even travel a lot, we have one old car, we live relatively modestly. It wasn’t that I was taught to take a less lucrative career, it was that finance or lawyering sounded like hell on earth to me and I wanted to be a writer. Maybe the problem is we built our life around his earning potential. It was exciting, but now I’m lost.[/quote]

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