Reply to Question for anxious parents: what are you truly afraid of?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is anyone worried about spending 400K on their kids' college degree and then the kid can't find a job?[/quote]

I will get criticized, but this is my honest observation:

Families who can comfortably pay $400k for 1 DC's college (so often over $1million for 2 kids esp if you consider this is post-tax net dollars and the opportunity investment cost) don't actually stress that much about whether their kids get can a job. They may have high expectations for getting the most prestigious and top-earning jobs, but these are not the families who fear their kids will starve and be homeless. Among our friend group, even those who have "normal great" jobs likes doctors, engineers, accountants, sales directors, etc. with HHI $250k-600k send their kids to state schools or try to get some merit. The ones who truly pays $400k cash out of pocket without loans have HHI $1mm+, and they are not worries their kids can't find any job. These parents and kids have enough connections, resources and frankly higher-than-average IQ that even if they don't get their dream job, they know they won't be working at Walmart.

I find it's typically the first-gen parents in the $200k-500k HHI category who are most intense about Ivies/T10 colleges. They have had some success themselves but are not secure about keeping that upward mobility going, [b]and if they had seen someone at work getting promoted in the fast lane or a new young boss coming in with a HYP degree, that's all it takes to get them obsessed about getting into T10.[/b] Many top 1% families I know actually care less about Ivies, jobs after undergrad and prefer the WASP and grad school route. [/quote]

Spot on. And chances are those parents themselves came from top-10 schools in their home countries.

In reality, the fast lane in this country is still reserved for certain groups. Immigrants may or may not recognize this, but they either conform to it—or their children actually see through  it and try to break through the ceiling by starting their own businesses. [/quote]

I disagree. I constantly see how the rich and elite class finds ways to get their kids in to top colleges. [b]Remember varsity blues?[/b] Why did all these celebrities and highly influential families need to pay someone to take the SATs for their children or lie about extra curriculars? The rich and influential people want more. Just being rich is not enough they want all sorts of labels and brands, job titles etc.. 
Also, we are in a high achieving high school district. Many parents went to Ivy or Ivy plus. And the kids of those parents have been bragging since they were 10 that thats where they are headed too. They are competitive and they not immigrants, not even Asians.[/quote]

The Varsity Blues families were not ultra high net worth. They all worked for a living, maybe $5-10mm assets, but not $50mm+. The latter from what I have seen prefer LACs. The 3 wealthiest families I personally know ($500mm+; one was generational oil money that will never run out) sent their kids to Bryn Mawr, Princeton, Vassar, USC and SMU. Only Princeton is T10. [/quote]

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