Reply to Was I wrong to skip MIL birthday dinner?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]The whole “someday you will be a grandparent” bit is so tired.[/b]

Yes, someday I hope to be a grandparent. And because I wasn’t raised in a barn, I would never throw out plans to busy parents with kids with only 24 hours of notice. I will respect my kids and their spouses enough to make invitations with lead time, and I’ll be open to alternate plans. We’ll figure out something that works for everyone, then we’ll enjoy each other’s company.

This will work especially well for things where you KNOW WHAT THE SPECIAL DATE IS, and can plan accordingly. It’s not like birthdays move around, FFS. [/quote]

It’s tired because the lack of self awareness is tiring. There seems to be a whole generation of women calling their MILs selfish and crazy when they can’t see their own rigidity and bitterness. Anyone at the point where they're saying things like “what adult even wants a birthday celebration?” Is the one who is cruel and mocking and it would be hard to believe their MIL problems are one sided.[/quote]

Again, B.S. My grandmothers were lovely, my mom and my MIL are lovely. They are considerate. They would never in a million years spring plans with 24 hours of notice; they respect our time, and their time. That is simply a matter of good manners. Either you have good manners, or you don’t. Either you have reasonable expectations based on respect for other people, or you don’t. And I have found in 50 years on this planet that manners and respect actually have very little to do with age or with generation.

I know plenty of self-centered young people; I know just as many rude, unreasonable older people.

Yes, some posters on here have posed rude questions and points. But THEY are not the central issue. The central issue is a rude MIL who issues appearance orders with 24 hours of notice. The husband is a dud, too. The only reasonable person in the mix is the OP. [/quote]

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